Page 36 of Defying the Earl
“I think they would enjoy it much more if we were present. What’s the sense of offering criticism if the recipient isn’t there to receive it?” Bea asked with a slightly nervous laugh, growing warm as the crowds pressed Nathan even closer to her. Before she could credit it, he had urged her behind a column. Despite being in such a crowd, it was almost as though they were the only people in the world.
All thought fled her mind and she felt as though heat were going to consume her. All she could see was Nathan’s warm, attentive gaze and it was drawing nearer.
“You are likely right,” Nathan said, even though she couldn’t remember what had prompted his comment. His head leaned over her and Bea’s lips parted on a gasp. “Or perhaps they took mercy on me, knowing I couldn’t wait to do this.”
He prevented any protest by sealing his lips over hers, not that Bea had any thought of protesting. No thought remained in her head for that brief moment. Butterflies swarmed in her belly and heat filled every part of her right down to her fingernails and toes.
It didn’t last long, or at least she didn’t think so. She was certainly breathless when Nathan’s head pulled slowly and gently away from hers, but Beatrice attributed that to the sensations filling her, not an actual passage of much time.
“My apologies, my lady,” Nathan said although he didn’t actually appear contrite. “I couldn’t resist.”
The fluttering in her stomach only increased and she could do nothing but nod, hoping her face didn’t betray how very silly and besotted she felt in that moment.
“Shall we return to our box and await the refreshments’ arrival?”
Beatrice nodded again and allowed him to tuck her hand back into the crook of his elbow, wondering what he was thinking. Was he going to turn their courtship into the real thing? Did she want him to? Of course, she did, she realized with a flicker of annoyance with herself. She hadn’t truly stopped loving him ever since they’d met at that wretched house party.
Not wretched, Bea insisted to herself as she resettled in the box, oblivious to the curious stares of her Ladies and the occupants of the other boxes around them. She hadn’t been harmed by the last two years in company with Lady Frampton and Lady Charlotte. In fact, one could almost say she was even better equipped to be a countess now than she had been two years prior. She was certainly more mature and much calmer than when she was younger. And Nathan was probably far more prepared to be a husband as Lord Braxton than he ever would have been as the adventurous Mr. Lawrence. Of course, Beatrice would have loved to follow him across the ocean. But he hadn’t asked her. He had left without a word. Could she ever forgive such callous behaviour? She could if he asked, she was sure.
The rest of the opera passed in a blur. Bea couldn’t have told you what the show was about, of course, but she knew it had been the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. When the curtain had dropped for the last time and they tried to make their way to their carriage, their progress was slow as it seemed to Beatrice that every noble in the building wished to stop and greet them. Despite the opera ending long before a ball usually would, it was still the wee hours of the morning before they made their way to their beds.
Bea’s heart was overflowing with delight as she settled herself onto her pillow that night. She only hoped she could keep the excitement within bounds. Surely it wouldn’t do to put her emotional cart before the horse.
Chapter Eighteen
Nathan still had to figure out what to do about his mission in York. Should he just tell Lord Chamberlain he couldn’t finish it and leave it at that? He didn’t see how he could with a good conscience. He had been tasked with an assignment. If he couldn’t see it all the way through to the end, he would have to find someone he trusted to do so for him. He was reasonably sure Viscount Adelaide had been through a similar situation, or perhaps it was one of his brothers, but Nate knew he could consult with Adelaide on the matter and trust that the information would not be divulged publicly. He would do his best to speak with him that day.
Courting, whether real or not, took up a lot of a man’s time, Nathan had realized. And he couldn’t leave the matter indefinitely. He ought not be so distracted. One more piece of evidence that his aunts’ companion was not the right woman for him. She was keeping him far too preoccupied. He supposed it was a good thing that she was going to reject his pursuit of her very soon. He didn’t have time for such foolishness.
He also didn’t have time for the sinking feeling that was swirling through his innards at the thought of her rejection.
How could he have kissed her like that? He was grateful she hadn’t slapped him right in the face for his forward behaviour.But she was obviously upset with him. She had barely uttered a word the rest of the night.
Had he truly compromised her with that kiss? No one had seen it, he was sure, or his aunts would have sent for him by now. The fact that they hadn’t told him Beatrice hadn’t said anything so it was likely she still expected to terminate their association.
As she should, Nathan insisted despite the troubled sensations filling him. He could barely imagine cutting her from his life now that he’d been enjoying her company, but really, as Braxton, he had much more important things to occupy himself with.
Ought he to call on her again? They never did plan out how she was to terminate their courtship. Nathan shook his head at himself even as he leaned over his desk, surveying the pile of papers littering it. He did not have time for foolishness this day.
The day passed quickly but he was finally satisfied with the state of his desk with the help of his secretary when he finally allowed himself time to socialize. He thought he might be able to stop in at his aunts’ house on the way to his club. He ought to see how their plan was progressing. While he didn’t really have time for courting today, he couldn’t find the strength within to stay away.
But when he rode past on their street it was obvious their parlour would be near to bursting at its seams from the number of horses and carriages standing outside. Nathan didn’t need to add to the number. Surely Beatrice and his aunts would barely notice his presence.Was that jealousy rising within him?Surely not, he scoffed to himself even as he fought with the desire to run inside and rid his aunts’ receiving room from any other gentleman. Just when he had realized he wanted Beatrice for himself, it would seem so had every other gentleman of theton.He couldn’t have it both ways. Either he turned their courtship into the real thing or he ended it. And neither could be done in the moment.
Heat climbed through him as he rode on by. He would never have expected himself to be so missish but he realized then that he had a deep need to feel special. He supposed that came of being born as the spare. And then having to fill the role now. He hadn’t been born to it or selected. It merely happened. His parents hadn’t intended for him to become Braxton, that was certain from the constant harping his mother insisted upon whenever he was in her presence.
Nathan tried to remind himself that he shouldn’t be angry with Beatrice over her sudden popularity. It was really his fault. But he had no interest in being a part of the crowd around her skirts. She was free to choose whomever she’d like. And never mind the disappointment that flooded him. Braxton could never be a follower, he insisted, not even of a lovely young woman.
When he arrived at the club, he discovered it was thinner of company than usual. They were likely all in Beatrice’s presence, he thought sourly as he settled into a comfortable chair with his glass. He was early but he told himself he would enjoy the quiet. Adelaide had agreed to meet him when Nathan had sent a note round to him earlier. Adelaide was known for not always being on time, so Nathan was unsure how long he’d have to wait.
To his surprise, though, Adelaide was actually already in the club and a footman soon directed him to where Nathan was sitting.
“I thought I’d come around early and see what was being said about things,” Adelaide said with a low chuckle as he seated himself in the big chair next to Nathan.
“And did you find out?”
“This and that,” Adelaide replied, unhelpfully, making Nathan raise his eyebrows. Adelaide chuckled again. “Did you know they are starting to take bets as to who your lady will choose?”
“I beg your pardon?” Nathan asked in an awful tone he couldn’t prevent.
