Page 57 of The Destined SEAL
Biting my lip, I try not to get upset. I’ve pushed these emotions away for years and years. It was my armor. My security. My heart’s way of protecting what has never been a wise choice. I shake my head. “Our past, though. How? How doyou overcome that? We’ll never forget that. Don’t fool yourself. It will always be there. How do you propose we make a fresh start?”
It’s now that a traitorous tear sneaks out of the corner of my eye. Norah and Robin. Marcus. The space between us and our friendship. Big pink balloons at airports. Almost kisses. First ones. Last ones. Then before that, stalwart friendship. Fights and games. Basketball. Push and pull. Give and take. Loss and grief.
Ben brings a thumb up and swipes at the tear. So many tears over this. Over us. “Funny you mention it,” Ben says, shifting in the chair next to me. His shoulder bumps into mine. “I have a proposition for you.”
Ben kneels next to the chair, and that’s when I lose it completely. These aren’t tears of sadness and regret that have washed my face so many times in the past. They’re happy tears falling over a smile so bright it’s making my face hurt.
Ben shakes his head. “I’m going to keep this real short, Harp, okay?”
He opens the box to expose my great-great-grandmother’s engagement ring. It’s exactly the same as I remember. A piece of jewelry I’ve always admired inside my mother’s chest. Benny and I played wedding one day long ago, and I stole it from her room to use. Ben almost dropped it down the air conditioner vent when he went to put it on my finger.
“Don’t want to drop it,” I whisper.
Ben nods, taking in a huge breath—a man unsure of the outcome. “One question, about our fresh start then.”
Wiping my eyes, I clear the pooling tears from my line of vision. I want clarity in this moment. I stay silent, waiting. Wondering if this is all one sick twisted joke. In my dreams this happened ten years ago.
“Now or never,” Ben says, removing the ring from the black velvet. “That’s the question.” Holding my left hand, he hovers next to my ring finger.
I nod. “Now,” I say. “Always now. Never never.”
Ben slips the ring on my finger, a perfect fit. I can’t take my eyes off his gaze to admire the ring because he’s looking at me with such a fullness that my heart aches. Not a happy ache either.
Afinallyache. A lifetime of love culminating in one good decision.
A decision a computer made.
“Fate Ballet,” Ben says, eyes glassing over, arms pulling me into a strong embrace.
“Now,” I say once again.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Ben
So much timehas been wasted. I can’t even call the decisions that kept us apart bad. Life kept us apart regardless of how much we wanted to be together. We aren’t wasting another goddamn second.
“What if you get called away last minute? What if you can’t make your own wedding, Ben Brahams?” Harper squeaks out underneath my body.
I raise one brow. “Someone can fill in for me,” I reply, dipping my head to kiss the hollow of her neck. “Like they have for the past few weeks.” I had to take time off work for the first time in a decade merely to get my fill of Harper. I wouldn’t be able to focus properly had I not taken the time to relax and just be with her in all ways. My mind has never been in a better place. With the truth came this calm clarity.
Harper grabs my arms and pushes me back to a kneeling position. I moved into her house the same night I proposed. She was a little stymied that I already had my stuff packed, but when I told her I put all my money on black, she had to appreciate my Herculean effort to claim what I wanted and rode me on my living room floor, front door wide open.
She scrambles up to kiss my mouth, her tongue dipping in and out, teasing me, and then runs her mouth down my pecs, abs, and down to my dick. She takes it into her mouth. I groan out a long string of curse words mixed with her name. I lay my hand gently on her head as she bobs up and down, but I don’t push down. She hates that. Harper sucks and licks at her own pace that just so happens to be frightfully maddening.
“I need to be inside you, Harp,” I say. “We don’t have enough time for this.”
I have to go to my parents’ house for the night, so we don’t spend the night before our wedding together. As it stands, three of Harper’s friends and her mom are in the kitchen behind our closed door. We’re supposed to be in here working on our vows, but we’ve done nothing but each other in the two hours the door has been locked.
“There’s always time for this,” Harper mumbles around my cock. She sits up. “But I’d rather like it if you were inside me.”
My dick jerks. “You’re speaking my love language,” I exclaim.
Harper presses a finger over my lips. “Quiet, they’ll hear you.”
I roll my eyes. “They heard your second orgasm when my tongue was fucking your pussy then, too.”
“My god. Say that again. I’ll come a third time,” Harper says, smirking. “I mean it,” she adds when I don’t speak.
