Page 152 of The Sun Sister
‘Oh, really?’ Cecily waited for the insult to follow the compliment, as it usually did with Bill.
‘Yes, really. So, I was wondering whether, well, you would consider, well, marrying me.’
‘I...’ Cecily looked up at him, stunned. ‘Please, Bill, don’t tease me. I’m all out of humour just now. What is it you actually want to say?’
‘Exactly that. I mean, it really is time that I took a wife to run the homestead, so to speak, and you and I seem to rub along together quite well, don’t we?’
‘I...well, yes, I suppose we do.’
‘And I did hear a little of your current...predicament when I was searching for you along the lakeside. So, as you were lying there on the bench, dead to the world, I thought that it might be possible to come to some sort of an arrangement which would be beneficial for both of us. If you see what I mean.’
Cecily could only stare at him in shocked silence. The fact he was telling her that he knew she was pregnant and was still offering his hand in marriage was beyond her scope of understanding. Besides which, this was Bill, the eternal bachelor.
‘I do understand that I am a good few years older than you – I turn thirty-eight this autumn – and that my home is, well, basic to say the least. If you were to say yes, I would make sure to build a proper one for you and the child. It would beourchild, of course. As far as anyone else need know, that is.’
‘Oh. I see. I think.’
‘There’s no reason why we couldn’t have more if we wanted, I suppose. People do, don’t they?’
‘Yes, but...’
‘I’m sure you have lots of “buts”, and this can hardly be the proposal a young woman like yourself would have expected when she was dreaming of her future. But...’ Bill sighed, ‘we are where we are, and I rather did feel that I might miss your presence if you were to scurry off to Switzerland and then back to America. It’s not a declaration of love, but it’s certainly the nearest I’ve got to one in a very long time. We’ve both been scarred by our past experiences and we should go into this...arrangement with our eyes wide open. That is, if you were to agree to it. Now, I will leave you alone to think about it, but if you did feel it was a possible solution to your quandary, then I would suggest that we announce our engagement sooner rather than later, which will stop tongues wagging and salvage your reputation. I’ll drop in again tomorrow to see how you are, by which time I hope you will have had the chance to consider my proposal. For now’ – Bill strode over to the bed, took Cecily’s hand in his and kissed it – ‘I will say goodbye.’
And with that, Bill turned on his heel and left the bedroom.
Cecily kept what Bill had said to herself – she’d learnt enough to know that Kiki was an impulsive person; parties were planned on the spur of the moment and decisions made in the blink of an eye. And if Cecily knew one thing, it was that she needed time to think alone. Whatever she decided, that decision would alter the course of her life irrevocably.
But at least shehada choice now, which made everything better, yet at the same time, more complicated.
When she heard Kiki’s footsteps pass her door, heading for her afternoon ‘siesta’, as she called it, Cecily went downstairs to sit on the bench by the lake and commune with her hippos.
‘Could I live here permanently?’ she asked them as she stared across the calm water. ‘It is so very beautiful after all. But more importantly,’ she sighed, ‘could I live with Bill...?’
She cast her mind back to his tin shack and tried to imagine herself there. At least he’d promised to build her a new house and it might be fun to create a wonderful garden like this one around it...The thought of being in charge of her own home was a mighty tempting one. And Katherine and Bobby would be her near neighbours...
Her parents would be thrilled to hear that she was marrying an Englishman from a good background – Bill’s brother, the major, was a friend of Audrey’s after all. But most important of all, she wouldn’t have to give up her baby, because Bill had told her he would bring the child up as his own. Yes, she was sure there would be local gossip about their shotgun wedding, and the subsequent early birth of their baby, yet that was nothing compared to having to relinquish her child for adoption.
‘But what about Bill...?’ she asked the hippos. ‘He’s made it plain that this is a marriage of convenience...’
On the other hand, weren’t all marriages ‘convenient’ in some way? A simple contract?
Besides, Cecily, you said you were done with love and would never trust a man again,she told herself firmly.So you’ve just got to stop hankering after it once and for all.
At the very least, she knew she could trust Bill to take care of her – he had saved her life after all – and to her surprise, after their first awkward meeting, she had recently begun to enjoy his company.
She wished she could ask him whether he’d want to consummate the marriage, so they could truly become man and wife, but of course, that was out of the question. Cecily squeezed her eyes shut to try and imagine what it would be like to have him kiss her. The thought really wasn’t so bad. He certainly wasn’t unattractive, even if he was fifteen years older than she was.
Or she could go to Switzerland and have the baby, then return to America to resume her life there...In truth, Cecily knew it would be impossible to look her parents in the eyes and keep her dreadful secret from them for the rest of her life.
Cecily stood up and walked to the water’s edge.
‘You know what, hippos? I don’t think there is a choice at all.’
That evening, Cecily sat with Kiki on the terrace, Kiki drinking a martini and Cecily a cup of ginger tea.
‘You look a lot better, honey.’
‘I feel it,’ Cecily replied.
