Page 57 of The Broken Heart Playlist
“No, she’s still around, just locked away,” Tess retorts. “Tell me, does New Kate have the key to her prison cell? Maybe she can let her out once in a while for a little yard time.”
Wow. Tess is sparing no punches tonight. Hot anger floods my veins. “Well, when Mature Tess makes her rare appearance, let me know.”
Aaron glances between the two of us. “What’s going on here?”
“You’ve been in jail for four years,” my sister says quietly. “It’s time to get out.”
Hurt swells at the base of my throat. It’s Grandma’s message all over again.
“Lisset is the only piece of happiness you allow yourself,” Tess continues, her eyes boring into mine. “You might have a chance at happiness with Gideon, but you’re refusing to take it. Don’t you see? Gideon could be your double roll. Your get-out-of-jail card.”
“No, he’s not.” How do I explain to her that when I look at Gideon, I feel both hopeful and hopeless?
“You don’t know that. I played it safe in my life because I saw how hurt you were after the end of your marriage. I chose to stay with a safe, comfortable man and pushed Aaron away because of that mentality. I almost lost him. I don’t want you to lose out on your chance of happiness with Gideon.”
My mind goes blank. I want to defend myself, but all my excuses are trapped in my throat.
To my shock, her eyes fill with tears. “I want you to be happy,” she bursts out on a sob. “I love you and I want my sister back.”
Seeing how upset Tess is, I feel my throat burn with emotion.
A squirrel once came through Tess’s cat flap and got stuck in her living room. In his panic, the squirrel kept running toward the closed glass door and banging himself against it, desperate to get out. He could see the garden through the glass, but he couldn’t get to his home.
Every time he hit the glass, he’d scamper back under the couch and then he’d emerge and run full tilt at the glass again. His nose was bruised and bleeding, but that didn’t stop him. He crashed into the glass over and over in his desperate bid to escape.
Is that why I want to stay in a prison of my own making? To avoid getting bruised and hurt?
We eventually managed to open the door and the squirrel escaped and recovered. I have to give him credit, though. Hedidn’t stop trying. And that’s what Tess is begging me to do. To try. Even if I end up getting hurt again.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
When I pick up Lisset from school on Friday, she tells me that the theme in the classroom today was around family appreciation. She holds up the colorful cards she made for everyone.
“Please can we drop them off, Mom,” she begs.
I agree to stop in at my parents’ house, because I have no desire to head home and wrestle the expansive quiet in my own house. Friday nights, for some reason, are the times I feel the saddest.
Grandma and my parents make a big fuss over the cards and I revel in Lisset’s evident happiness.
“Looks like you had fun at school today making those cards,” Grandma comments.
We’re sitting around the kitchen table eating my mom’s minestrone soup, which is my favorite comfort food.
“I had tons of fun,” Lisset confirms, dipping her baguette into the soup.
“I miss those days,” Grandma remarks wistfully.
“You can have fun with Google, GG,” Lisset tells her.
“What planet are you on, child?” Grandma asks. “Fun and Google don’t go together.”
“I have fun with Google,” Lisset insists.
Grandma eyes her skeptically. “Maybe you have a different Google.”
“They’re all the same, Grandma,” I tell her.
“Want me to show you?” Lisset asks.
