Page 122 of The Broken Heart Playlist
All too soon, it’s time to pack up and head home. Ten minutes into the drive, Lisset and Grandma are fast asleep in the back seat, snoring lightly. Behind the wheel, Gideon rotates his shoulders to ease some of the tightness.
“I had the best time today,” I admit.
He reaches across the center console and twines his fingers with mine, the gesture easy and intimate. “So did I.”
“Our last summer outing. I wish we could have stayed there forever.”
“So do I. I guess all good things come to an end eventually though.” He glances over at me, shooting me an eye-crinkling smile that takes my breath away. “I love you,” he says.
Those words falling so freely and effortlessly from his lips, with no demand on me to return the sentiment, cause something to loosen in my chest. The cold, hard shell of mistrust that has encased my heart for so long is disintegrating, the pieces washing away in the flood of emotion sweeping through me.
A surreal feeling ripples over me. Gideon is both new and familiar to me all at the same time. As if I’ve known him forever and yet I’ve only now discovered him. Everything that was all jumbled inside me suddenly becomes crystal clear. I realize it’s not only being loved that fills my soul. It’s loving someone as well.
And I love Gideon Walker.
My anchor. My lighthouse. My life raft. My compass.
Overused clichés to everyone else but me. Because I feel the truth of all those sentiments when I look at him.
Yes, I’m scared, but all the more reason in this beautiful, broken world to cling to those you love. In them, you find fragments of beauty and kindness and grace to carry you through those endlessly dark nights.
I love him.
I had the key all along to the words locked inside my throat. I simply needed to use it. No more being cowardly. No more missed chances.
“I love you,” I say to him.
He goes perfectly still. And quiet. Like he’s absorbing the impact of those words.
“Say it again,” he demands. “Please.”
“I love you.” My voice is firm and clear, laced with wonder. “I love you, I love you.”
He squeezes my hand, his jaw flexing. “I can’t believe you decide to tell me that when I’m driving, when all I want to do is haul you in my arms and kiss the heck out of you.”
“It felt like the right moment,” I tell him.
“I’ll take it, because you’ve made me a very happy man.”
And then Grandma pipes up from the back seat, “Just pull over, why don’t you, and kiss the heck out of her. I’m in no hurry to get home.”
Three weeks later, the weather feels restless, no longer straddling the line between summer and fall. Instead, it’s tipping more toward fall weather today, with a sharp chill to the air that hints at rain later on.
After dropping Lisset off at school, I decide to drop by Gideon’s house for a cup of coffee since I have no shoots scheduled for today.
Gideon pulls me into his arms the moment I step inside, Uno dancing excitedly around us. “I’m starting to suspect you’re using me for my coffee,” he murmurs against my lips.
“You caught me,” I acknowledge, breathing in the scent of him. “It’s your coffee machine that’s captured my heart.”
“Addict.”
“Addicted to you.” I kiss him lightly, before swatting him on the butt. “Now go show me its magic.”
While Gideon brews coffee, I browse his bookcase in the living room, running my fingers along some of the titles, admiring his eclectic taste in books.
I’m about to turn away when something catches my eye. The corner of a photograph tucked away between two books, as if inserted there and then carelessly forgotten.
It’s none of my business. At least that’s what I try to tell myself.
