Page 104 of The Weight Of Falling
“That song is definitely not calming.”
“Exactly. Hopefully, she’s got it all taken care of now.”
“What’s up?”
Tess exhales. “I was debating whether or not to tell you this.”
Her tone is so serious I stop doodling and straighten in my chair. “Okay, that’s a scary opener.”
“Sorry, I didn’t mean it to be.” She sighs again. “Look, I’m just going to tell you, and you can decide what to do with the information.”
“What information? What’s going on?”
“I went to Cooper’s Hill yesterday.”
My brow furrows. Cooper’s Hill is a town about thirty minutes away.
“Okay,” I say, wondering where she’s going with this.
She hesitates. “And I saw Joel.”
A sense of dread lances through me. My mind immediately darts to the worst case scenario. “Was he with another woman?”
“No,” Tess reassures me hastily. “Nothing like that. He was alone.”
Relief floods through me so fast I slump forward. “Okay. Then what?”
“I saw him walk into one of the buildings downtown. The community center on the corner.”
“I think I know the one.”
“They hold meetings there.”
“What kind of meetings?”
“AA meetings,” she says gently.
The hum of the refrigerator is loud in the quiet. I take a few minutes to breathe, to let the shock fade while my mind races, fitting the puzzle pieces together.
Joel doesn’t drink. Not even a sip. And he’s remained silent on his reasons why. His foster parents were guarded, almost wary, around him. As though they never quite knew what version of him they’d get.
“I know he doesn’t touch alcohol,” Tess adds. “And when I saw him go in there... I don’t know...it just clicked.”
It clicks for me too. The obsessive training. The discipline. The walls he puts up. Maybe he’s been to the edge and made terrible mistakes. And maybe he’s still trying to atone for them.
I rub my chest, trying to ease the tightness there.
“I haven’t told Aaron,” Tess says. “Or Sofia. Just you.”
“Thank you,” I say softly.
“I thought you’d want to know.”
I pick at a mark on the counter. “I do. And I appreciate you telling me.”
“What are you going to do?” she asks.
“I’m not sure. Talk to him, I guess.”
