Page 54 of Bewitched By the Sea Monster
“Oh no. Do I sound miserable? Or lookit?” I combed my hands through my hair and winced when I remembered one palm was covered in blood, and sighed. “I’m not. Miserable. Honest. It’s just been a weird couple of days. And theisleisweird. And I amterrifiedof the ocean. I was getting heart palpations just sitting here. And I came into this trip stressed—we had this crisis at work right before I left. So I’m just off-kilter, I think. And everyone gets the urge to run back home when they’re off-kilter. Y’know?”
To this, Alistair said nothing.
But I’d said that all very fast, and he needed time to mull words over.
“Sorry,” I said after a long beat of silence. “That was a lot. I know. I babble sometimes. It’s a problem.”
“It’s not a problem,” Alistair finally said. “You don’t need to be sorry.I’msorry.”
Which was not what I was expecting. “What areyousorry for?”
“That you’re u-unhappy. That you’re scared of the water,” Alistair said. “And that I want to k-keep you near the water. I like speaking—talking—I liketalkingto you. But I don’t want you to be scared.”
And there went that pesky jiggling in my chest again, the same as I’d felt when I’d first arrived on the isle. But it sharpened into a wriggling worm wrapped in barbed armor.
Ithurtthis time.
I jittered my hand, trying to shake off the excess feeling. And then I hissed a “sorry,” when I caught myself doing it, and turned to popping my knuckles instead. But then I smeared blood everywhere, groaned, and parked my hands under my bottom.
The wriggling in my chest continued. From Alistair’s emotions: sorrow and fear and hope and desperation. But from my emotions too. The shame of what I’d been putting poor Jackson through the last couple of days. Fear—always fear—when I could hear the rumble of waves and smell the stench burbling from the sea. Curiosity, of this tentative new friendship, and desire, to see where it might lead.
“Pippi?” Alistair pressed gently.
And maybe it was his kindness that had my mouth spouting this absolutely foolish question. “Can you surface anywhere near the rocks?”
“I can,” he said. “On the other side.”
Likely, the part that faced the open sea, where there weren’t any tourist cottages.
“Could you take me there? If I…” Stars, this wasabsurd.“If I climbed down to you, could you take me to a spot where you could surface? It feels wrong talking to you like this. Like I’m taking advantage of the fact that I can’t see you, so I’m just prattling on. And I think Iliketalking to you too. But I want to converse properly. Y’know?”
An incoming wave chuffed and huffed, chortling at my brazenness.
Alistair said nothing.
Doubt and disgust wound thorny vines around my belly. What was I thinking?
I opened my mouth, getting ready to blurt anever mind.But the words shriveled when Alistair finally spoke, “I would like that very much.”
“Could you take me there?”A simple question.
“I would like that very much.”A simple answer.
But the words feel…
Heavy?
I’m certain that’s not the word I want.
“I’m terrified of the ocean…”
“Could you take me there?”
It all feels…
Big.Her question. That she fears the waters but trusts me to keep her safe. It all feels big and heavy and…
Once, in another life, anotherworld,I’m told I am…
