Page 14 of Control Freak
“I do,” Holden argued. “We talk, don’t we? We’re friends. You said so.”
“Well, yeah, but?—”
“I’m not in the same state. They won’t follow you all the way here, will they?”
“I don’t know. I couldn’t promise that.”
“Well, they won’t even know who I am. There’s no connection between us that anyone could track.”
I nodded slowly. “That’s true.”
“I can leave right now. You’re in St. Louis, right?”
“Yeah.”
“I can be there in six hours.”
My head spun. Everything was happening so fast. Was I really going to do this?
“I can’t ask you to drive all that way,” I protested weakly.
“You’re not asking; I’m offering.”
“Maybe I could take a bus, but…” I shook my head, chest tightening. “This is too much. I can’t intrude on your life. You’ve put me on this pedestal in your mind, but I’m not the perfect guy you think I am.”
“No. Your taste in men has obviously been shit in the past.”
A shocked laugh escaped me. “Yeah. No lies detected.”
“I know that who you project on cam shows isn’t the real you,” Holden said. “But when we talk about our day, isn’t it? I know you love true crime shows, even though they give you nightmares if you watch them too late at night, and that you love Taylor Swift because of the example she sets for young girls. I know your favorite fruit is watermelon, but you find cantaloupe repulsive, and that you absolutely hate the cold, dreary weather.”
“Yeah,” I said softly.
Truth was, I’d shared more with him than I ever should have with a client. He really did know me. Maybe not the personal info of my day-to-day life, but the core of who I was inside.
The boundaries had blurred long before now.
“I’ve told you about my trauma and my touch aversion,” Holden continued. “You were there when I needed you to listen. Let me be there for you now. Let me come get you, Shy. Let meknowthe real you.”
Holden was so insistent. So earnest. How could I refuse?
I licked my dry lips, nerves fluttering in my belly. “I can’t pay you.”
“I know.”
“This isn’t… We’re not boyfriends. I can’t exchange sexual favors for money, even though I do it online. I know that might seem silly, but?—”
“I can’t touch you, Shy. I’m not expecting anything like that. I just want you to be safe.”
“Right. Yeah. I just needed to be sure.”
“So is that a yes? You’ll let me come pick you up?”
I blew out a breath, my lips quirking. “That bruise must be really ugly for you to offer all this.”
“Send me your address,” Holden said, obviously recognizing my surrender. But really, what else could I do? I had to get away from Brick and Curtis. “I’ll be there by 1 a.m.”
“Meeting your camboy fan in the middle of the night,” I said lightly. “Nothing risky about that.”
