Page 23 of Cheap Shot
“It’s good to know there are some things that never change.” I chuckle, remembering being late for school because we were waiting for Alise. After a few calls from the principal, Auntie Peggy started setting the clocks in their house twenty minutes early just to make sure she wouldn’t make us late anymore.
“Even telling her an earlier time, that woman always finds a way to be late.”
“She probably expects that you’re telling her earlier than usual just to make sure she isn’t late. Then she calculates how much time she really has, but is still late,” I quip, knowing that’s exactly what Alise is doing. “Y’all need to just accept that Alise is going to be late no matter what you do, and plan accordingly.”
“We have already been doing that. It’s one reason we never let her drive anywhere. That way, we can control what time she arrives.” Beau chuckles as another text message comes in.
Ramona
You two should arrive at the same time. Darius and Ford both have scored goals already.
“That’s my boy.” Beau fist bumps in the air, before grabbing his phone and shooting off a response to Ramona. “She said the gate is open. Not much walking is necessary at all.”
“Some of us could use a little workout after all those plates of Momma’s lasagna you ate.”
“I’m a growing boy, Cole.” Beau rubs his distended belly before pulling into a parking spot closer to the fields. “Besides, I spent an extra hour at the gym today to prepare for dinner tonight. I can never say no to anything Momma cooks.”
“Good thinking, Beau. Good thing Momma made your favorite for dinner instead of mine, or we’d be in a very different situation.”
“A few extra pounds never hurt anyone.”
“They can hurt a lot when you’re back at the bottom of the totem pole, fighting for a place on the ice.”
“Cole…” Beau’s voice trails off, no doubt searching for the perfect thing to say to make everything all better.
Unfortunately for us, there’s nothing he can say. What I said was the truth. No matter whether it’s with the Timberwolves or another team, I’m back to square one. Not only am I the low man on the totem pole, but I’m injured, at that. If I don’t get back into skating shape before rookie camp, I’ll have no chance of getting any time on the ice this season besides in practice.
We both hop out of the truck and head toward the field. Instead of our usual comfortable silence, this one is filled with the charged words of our conversation. Instead of telling my brother how I feel like a grownup, I take a different approach and change the subject.
“So…you and Alise. Is it official yet?”
Beau halts mid-step. He slowly turns to face me, a guarded expression on his face. “Not gonna happen, little brother.”
Alise and Beau have been dancing around each other for years. Even someone who hasn’t spent any significant amount of time around them knows how they feel about each other, but neither one of them will make a move. It doesn’t help that Beau is as stubborn as they come. He’s decided that things would never work between them, so they remain in this weird limbo.
Do the two of them giving a relationship a try have the potential to change our entire family dynamic if things don’t work out? Of course, but if they are still pining for each other after all these years, they have to know by now there is something between them. I don’t believe in soul mates and all the mumbo jumbo, but there is something there between them. Even I can see that.
“Hey, at least you didn’t say never.”
Beau narrows his eyes. “Don’t go there, Cole.”
“I guess some things never change.”
Beau crosses his arms, eyeing me skeptically. “You know what you need, Cole?”
“Way to change the subject.” I exhale a quiet laugh, but there is no humor in it. “I need a lot of things, Beau. Try being more specific.” A Cheshire grin spreads across his face, but I hold up my finger in warning. “And if you say ‘girlfriend,’ so help me?—”
“Oh, you need a girlfriend for sure. But you need something to focus your attention on besides your rehab.”
“My rehab for my shoulder and getting back into shape for the upcoming season is my life until further notice, Beau.”
“I get that.” His voice softens. “But all rehab and no life won’t fix what’s broken inside.”
I look away, jaw clenched shut. He doesn’t know how broken I really am. No one does, and I want to keep it that way. I just need to control my cravings, the anger, and all these feelings I can’t seem to keep locked away for much longer. Speaking with a kid that’s probably more fucked up that I am? Sure, it could help, or I could just fuck both of us up even more. Not to mention my other dirty little secret, but I at least have some control over that part of my life.
“I’m not broken, Beau. Do I have anger issues? Sure, but I always have. Was I out of control earlier? Yes, I was. I own that and will take steps to make sure it never happens again, but that doesn’t mean I’m broken.”
“Broken was the wrong word, I guess. But you need something to put your heart into. Something else to focus on while you find your way back in the game, Cole. That’s why you should join the Big Brothers Big Sisters program with the Timberwolves. You’re going to be the newest member of the team this season. It will go a long way with Coach and the rest of the team if you take part in the program.”
