Page 67 of Ruthless with a Rogue
She nodded slowly, still watching him, assessing him.“I think that while it is important to acknowledge the hardship of others—the fact that there will always be others worse off than you… It is equally permissible to admit that you have suffered trials as well.”
She reached out and boldly took his hand, turning it over while she traced his palm over the kidskin leather of his black gloves.He swallowed hard, his clamoring heart drowning out the buzz of theater guests.She glanced at him beneath a frill of gold lashes, paralyzed him.That stare saw more than he’d ever meant her to see.Usually, he excelled at hiding himself behind sarcasm, rude remarks, and scars healed over to create an impenetrable skin.But his armor didn’t stand a chance against those blue eyes.
“I have a loving, albeit somewhat distant, father and a roof over my head,” she continued.“However, it doesn’t negate the pain I feel from the knowledge my mother deemed me lacking, unworthy of her presence.It doesn’t mean I’m not allowed to have wished for a mother who would have loved me.It doesn’t mean that I don’t wonder if I had done something different, been someone different, would she have stayed?”
“Your mother is an idiot,” he said gruffly, pulling his hand away.He shook it out, like he could shake off the way this conversation had his muscles tightening, poised to flee.Her words were too accurate, their shared hurts too similar.It was a dangerous connection.
“As was yours,” she said softly, a sad, commiserating smile tilting her lips.And as if she knew how close he was to bolting, she changed the subject.“Now tell me about the children.How many do you house?”
A soft breath of relief whooshed between his teeth.“As of right now, we have five-and-thirty permanent residents, but we are bursting at the seams.We have fifteen more staying at the home who are due to move into the second home we’re building, along with five-and-twenty others we have put up with families temporarily until the second home is complete.”
“Oh my stars.How incredible!A second home!”She leaned forward, her blue eyes shimmering with excitement.
Derek grimaced, and the dark cloud that had hung over him all week came storming back with a vengeance.
She cocked her head, small lines pinching her brow.“Why do you look as though that is a bad thing?”
“Unfortunately, we can no longer afford to build the second home.”
“Oh.”The excitement in her eyes fizzled out.
He mourned the loss more than he should have.He cleared his throat.“That is, unless I marry Lord Wentworth’s daughter,” he said, voice void of emotion.“In which case, he has offered to make a donation large enough that we can continue the build.”
“Oh,” she parroted.
He gave a clipped nod.“We’re short on time.This build will take time.The longer we delay, the longer we’re cramming all those children together.We can’t afford to take years to accumulate the funds.Nor do I want that.This home was going to househundredsof children.We need construction to start long before winter hits.”
Her small, delicate hand landed softly over his hand again.“I’m sorry, Derek.”
She was so earnest, staring up at him, deep blue pools fringed with gold lashes.And he didn’t understand why, but an incredible ache built in his chest.
“Perhaps I can help?”she whispered.
He lifted a brow in silent question.
“It is just another puzzle.If we put our heads together, perhaps we can figure out a way for you to raise the money.”
“It’s a hefty sum, and unfortunately most people aren’t interested in giving their money away without gaining something in return.Rutledge and I have already touched on all options and come up dry.”
She smiled, a spark flaring in her eyes.“Ah, but perhaps what you’re missing is a woman’s mind.”
His lips curled up.Always willing to go to war, this woman.“Not just any woman’s mind.With your mind, Wellington, perhaps we do have a fighting chance.”
But it wasn’t something he was going to allow himself to believe.
Hope was too dangerous a game.
35
Derek
DerekassistedLadyElliot,gripping her arm firmly as she stumbled up the steps to the front door of her rented rooms.Livy supported her aunt from the other side, occasionally stumbling herself as she tried to assist in supporting her aunt.Derek wasn’t sure if Livy’s assistance was actually helping or making things worse.He let out a rough breath.Soon she’d be in the safety of her home, and Derek could make his goodbyes.Not that he was running away or anything.Would it be rude to just dump them inside the front door and leave?
Not running away, mate?
Shut it.
“Look at me, being escorted home by such a dashing rogue.”Lady Elliot giggled.“Oh, what Nigel must think of me!You don’t hold a candle to him, Lord Dunmore.”She hiccupped.“No offense.”
