Page 86 of The Wolf and the Wildflower
Jules went to her mother, brushed a kiss on her cheek, and walked away, disregarding her protests. She had her own letter to write, and somewhere Jules had to find the courage to face living a life she did not understand.
Chapter Seventeen
The small announcement printed in the left corner of the newssheet was barely discernable, hardly worthy of attention. Yet, James saw it because there was nothing about Jules Southby that could escape his awareness, even if it was a post in theGentleman’s Magazinein the section of notices of deaths and causes of death.
Jules Southby, late of Derbyshire, perished in a carriage accident, the only son of noted Physician and Alienist Dr. Charles Southby.
James read it for a third time, grappling with the flash of agony searing through his veins. A dark bleakness covered him.Gone?Jules Southby was dead? The torment that tore through James was unlike anything he’d ever felt. The sound that came from him had his mother and sister gasping, lurching toward him like marionettes.
“James! Whatever is the matter,” his sister cried, all the excited chatter about the ball to start in a few hours forgotten.
He had always possessed a very determined will, which had saved him more than once. Such weakness was abhorrent, and he would recover from losing her. He had to. Yet the crack inside his chest felt like it would never be made whole. A snarl hissed from him as anguish almost cleaved him in two.
“James,” a voice cried behind him, “whatever is the matter? You are scaring us!”
He whirled to see his mother peering at him with wide, fearful eyes. “What is it?”
James ruthlessly drew on the cold he had used to help him survive the ten years alone and could not find it. “She is dead,” he said harshly, “And I do not know if I can survive her loss.”
His sister gasped, and his mother frowned. “Who has died?”
“Jules Southby.” The words were scraped from the back of his throat.
Confusion pleated her brows, and she shook her head sharply. “What do you mean? Mr. Southby is dead?”
“An announcement was made in the paper. A carriage accident it seems.”
“Good heavens!” She rushed forward and plucked up the crumpled paper, quickly reading it. “This is terrible news. We must send out condolences to Dr. Southby.” She looked up at him and froze. “You areanguished. I can see it cut into your face, and it is frightening me.”
“I cannot live without her. Not now. Maybe after years of happiness I could bear to part from her…but not now.”
“Her?”
She stared at him for a long time, then slapped a hand over her mouth. “The mysterious lady you danced with at the ball. That was Jules Southby.Good God. This is…this is unfathomable. How is it possible that…that Mr. Southby was a woman? I cannot…this is shocking andscandalous!”
Felicity started to sob, and when she came over to James and hugged him, he allowed the embrace, somehow needing it to anchor him against the hole appearing in his heart. Had she even seen his letter? Had she known that she was loved endlessly? That rough, terrible sound once again hissed from him, and he closed his eyes as the burn of tears welled behind his eyes.
“Leave me,” he said gruffly.
His sister stepped from him, wiping the tears from her cheeks. “What will you do?”
Roar his pain and drown it by drinking several glasses of whisky. As if she sensed his intention, his mother haltingly came forward.
“James, you must be presentable for the ball in only a couple of hours.”
“Mama!” Felicity cried. “Surely James—”
“No,” the duchess said, sorrow deep in her eyes. “I am very sorry for it, but I am begging you, James. The Prime Minister will be in attendance along with several of the most illustrious members of our society. You must be there…and you must show the world, which will be examining every action as if you are under a microscope, that you are the indomitable Duke of Wulverton. Then, in a few weeks, you must announce the selection of your duchess.”
He leveled his gaze on his mother and she blanched, flinching from whatever she saw in his eyes.
“James, I am sorry she is gone but she would not have been suitable for—”
The duchess paled at the growl that leaped to his throat.
“Brother, please forgive Mama’s thoughtlessness. She did not mean to be as callous as how she sounded. We would support whomever you love.”
James did not answer her, for he understood his duty to his family. Yet it was the burning rage and pain seething in his gut that robbed him of the power to speak. His mother beckoned his sister, and with a regretful glance at him, his sister and mother departed, leaving him alone.
