Page 77 of Perfect Pairing
“You gave me a pretty big opening,” I pointed out. Then, softer, I added, “Why are you doing this to us?”
Brie was silent for painful, interminable moments. Did she…not want me? Had I so grossly misread the situation?
“It’s not that I don’t want you,” she said at last, answering the question I hadn’t asked aloud as she turned to face me. “I just…I can’t, Ez. Nothing has changed.”
“Everythinghas changed, honey.” A gasp left her, and her hand flew to her mouth with the resurrection of the old nickname. “Your dad is no longer in charge at the winery, and Amara would be pretty hypocritical to fire me for hooking up with you when, for one, you don’t even work there, and two, she was sleeping with Calvin when she was still his boss.”
“I don’t want just a hookup, Ez,” she said softly. “You know that’s not my style.”
“But back then—”
“You knew I was going to ask for more that morning,” she protested, pointing a finger at me, her voice rising in volume, the sadness in her eyes flaring into anger. “That’s why you cut me off and ran away.”
I hung my head, sufficiently chastened. She wasn’t wrong.
“Things are different now.”
“How? What has changed exactly? Because from where I’m standing, you’re still the same man, and I’m still just some girl.”
“For starters,” I said, taking a tentative step around the islandtoward her. When she retreated, I stopped and rested my hands on the counter, my gaze locked on hers. “You’re notsome girl. You’re a beautiful, talented, intelligentwoman.”
Even back then, at twenty-two, she’d been more woman than girl, her head on straighter than most.
“Okay, fine.” She rolled her eyes. “I’m abeautiful, talented, intelligent woman. What about everything else? Or are you forgetting you have a son? That little boy who has to take priority over whateverthis”—she gestured between us—“is?”
“So you’re admitting there’s something here,” I said, unable to contain my grin.
Brie sighed, clearly exasperated. “That’s not the point, Ez.”
“Of course I’m not forgetting about Hansen,” I said. “But he’s older now. Five and in school full time. Plus, it’s been years since all the bullshit with Shannon. We’re both doing better, and he doesn’t need me as much.”
The realization honestly broke my heart, but my baby boy was becoming more self-sufficient by the day. He obviously wasn’t old enough to do things like cook for himself or drive him places, but even though he was only five, I was already dreading those days. The days when I’d have to let him go out into the world on his own and make his own memories and a life that no longer revolved around me.
He’d always be my baby boy, and I’d always be his father, but damn…watching him grow up and become this person who no longer needed me as much was so fucking bittersweet.
“I don’t know what you’re saying,” she murmured, but the way she avoided eye contact with me told me she knew exactly what I was getting at.
We could no longer use Hansen as a buffer between us. My son could no longer serve as the reason we weren’t giving into this fucking pull to each other.
“The last two years have given me a lot of perspective on the things I want out of life.”
“Which is?”
“You. Just you.Alwaysyou.”
Maybe I was laying it on a little thick, but I didn’t know how else to be. I wanted her in ways I never imagined, in ways I never thought I’d be able to feel again after Shannon had slowly dismantled my heart and belief in love and romantic relationships. Since then, the love for my son and my father were the only kind I anticipated ever experiencing again.
And then this woman blew into my life, with her quiet beauty, those emerald green eyes that ensnared me every time I looked into them, how important her family was to her, and her passion and talent for her chosen craft—well, I was a fucking goner from the first moment I looked at her across the winery dining room.
I’d had her once, and I fucked it up.
I wasn’t going to make the same mistake twice.
Brie leaned over, propping her elbows on the island and resting her head in her hands. When she spoke, her voice was muffled.
“I just don’t know if I can trust you.” She looked up at me again, those jewel-toned orbs shining.
“Then at least give me the opportunity to prove you can.”
