Page 8 of A Cowboy's Claim
Sydney forced herself to keep a neutral expression. Something edging toward optimism, but not gleeful. She could fake the expression on her face but couldn’t do anything about the hollow pit in her belly.
She could perhaps keep a good man from wasting his life.
Declan thought for another moment. “Slightly different topic. Did you want to stop seeing me completely? Now that I changed things up, are you calling us off?”
This answer was easy and instant because the idea of having to give him up a second before she needed to might be the straw that broke her. “If you’re talking about sex, as long as you’re not involved with anyone else, I’m okay keeping our status quo intact. I will not see you once you have another woman in your life.”
“Thank God,” he muttered.
A snicker-snort escaped her.
Declan offered a sheepish smile. “Excuse me for being crude, but I really like fucking you.”
“Trust me, the feeling is mutual. But while we have a very healthy relationship within our parameters, if you’re really looking for more, you should find someone who can give you more. I want that for you.”
He shrugged. “I’ll think about it.” His expression turned darker. Needier. “Okay if I come over?”
Hell yes. “Give me an hour and I’ll be ready for you,” she promised.
During the trip home alone in her truck, Sydney stared at the passing countryside and debated one more time if she was making the right choice.
She saw no other answer. The clinic couldn’t run without the financial support of her grandfather. The support would be cut off if she got involved with Declan.
Frankly, that was the least of her worries. Getting involved with Declan, seriously involved, might make her gut tense with anticipation, but the mental images swiftly morphed into terror goosebumps and stomach wrenching nausea.
Physician, heal thyself.
Great idea, but it wasn’t that easy. Her fears were still too raw and too real. Until she got over them, she couldn’t be withanyonelong term.
Not even a gentle giant with pale grey eyes that seemed to peer right into her soul.
Late that nightwhen Declan let himself into his apartment under the High Water artists’ studio, his body was loose and spent. But beneath the surface, his soul pulled tight with a need he couldn’t name.
He moved around the unit quietly, putting things away more out of rote habit than with deliberate thought. The place was cool, the fan on the heater/air conditioner running with a soft hum. In the shower, cold water sprayed down and enveloped him, goosebumps rising even as he washed traces of Sydney off his skin.
Crawling under his cold sheets to lay staring up at the ceiling, it didn’t take more than a minute for clarity to arrive.
The scent of her lingered even after the quick rinse. But it wasn’t just her touch he couldn’t shake—it was the way she looked at him, as if she saw everything.
Enough moping. He had other things that he needed to concentrate on for the good of his family and the good of High Water.
As always, when he thought about the ranch, Jeff’s old saying came to mind.Pay it forward.The reason High Water existed.
Declan had needed a major distraction after Sadie died. And Jake needed something to focus on after becoming completely disillusioned with his job with the RCMP going sideways.
But if he wasn’t here in Heart Falls with his brothers, Declan like to think that he’d still be doing something like this with Sadie. Giving to those who needed some help. Offering a second chance to people who had taken a wrong turn.
It wasn’t exactly what Jeff had done. Declan and his brothers hadn’t been doing anything wrong when their mom died. They’d been three little lost boys, and Jeff had been there, a solid place for them to stand as they dealt with loss and sorrow.
A shot of pain cracked through Declan’s chest.
He gasped, pressing a hand to his heart
Not often, but sometimes—grief still hit brutally hard. The pain of losing someone who was your whole damned world.
When he lost his mom, there were moments when he couldn’t breathe. He’d gone deep inside himself, and his stepfather was the one who’d let him grieve yet kept him from sliding into the darkness.
Losing Sadie?—
