Page 146 of In Case You Didn't Know
Another person I’ve pushed away. My stomach tightens.
“I’ll tell her.”
Our eyes lock.
It’s time to start cleaning up the mess I made. And fighting for what I want. In the light, in the open.
Where she can see me.
And where – if I’m really lucky – she’ll choose me.
FRANCIE
I’m sitting at my desk in the lighthouse, staring at my laptop screen, wishing the words would appear from nowhere so I can finish this book and go back to brooding.
It’s been two days since I got back to Liberty. Two days of trying to write, of dodging concerned texts from my brothers, and ignoring every single message Asher’s sent.
I took the ferry alone. Watched the island come into view through eyes that felt raw from holding back tears. And when Jesse picked me up at the dock, I smiled and told him I was fine, even though we both knew I was full of crap.
I’ve barely left the lighthouse since.
I told myself I needed space to write, but really, I needed space to breathe. To untangle the mess inside me. To stop hearing his voice every time I close my eyes.
The phone rings, and I almost don’t answer. But when I see Autumn’s name flash across the screen, something inside me shifts. She deserves more than silence. She always has.
I press accept and lift the phone to my ear. “Hey.”
“About time,” Autumn says, her voice warm and wry. “I was starting to think you’d ghosted me for good.”
The way she says it reminds me of Asher. The way he ignored me.
And I realize I’ve been doing the same to her. Avoiding talking to her, telling her what was happening.
I accused him of not thinking about what I want. But I’ve done exactly the same to Autumn. My best friend would want to know what’s happening. To be in the loop.
Instead, I excluded her.
“I was going to call you,” I say. “I just… there’s something I need to tell you.” Because even if this is all a mess right now, she deserves to know. I’m done hiding. And if she hates me for a while, so be it.
I’ll make it up to her somehow.
“Let me guess. It has to do with Asher.” Her voice is gentle, like she knows I’m feeling vulnerable right now. And this is why I love her.
“How do you know?” I rasp. Tears pool in my eyes. What a mess I’ve made of things.
“Oh sweetie, you sound like a wreck. Just like him. I figured something was up when you ghosted me harder than a bad Tinder date. But I didn’t think it was my big brother making you do it.”
“You’ve spoken to Asher?” Hope immediately rises in my chest.
“I did. I wasn’t supposed to say anything because he’s worried you’ll be upset that he told me. But honey, he’s broken. Seriously, I’ve never seen him so low.”
I press my lips together, trying to ignore the lump in my throat. “He shut me out.”
“I know,” she says. “And you were right to be angry. He knows that. But Francie, my brother cares for you in a way that terrifies him. He’s spent his whole life protecting people because nobody ever protected him.”
I close my eyes, her words hitting something deep inside me. She’s right. She’s always right.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “For not calling. For not telling you what’s going on. I shut you out and you didn’t deserve that.”
