Page 75 of Pack Ruin
“Exactly.”
I set down the knife, trying to remember what calm felt like. The only place I’d ever felt that was Brand’s lake. I closed my eyes and pictured it.
It was working until Glen said, “Speaking of fucking, when are you gonna give up the old V card?” I heard the sound of someone punching someone else, and when Glen wheezed, I grinned.
“This… This isn’t the time,” Luke sputtered. “There are enemies all around, and?—”
“Come on, Luke, we’re not in a sewer now. You know there’s never going to be a good time. Go do the bitey mambo with our girl, and level up. It’ll make you stronger. Her, too. I bet it helps her wolf come out.”
I stood and put the paring knives and whetstone away, considering Glen’s words as I sat back down at the table. He might be right; I wasn’t certain why my wolf hadn’t emerged, not even during the full moons since I was forced to shift for the first time, but she felt close.
I didn’t really need a reason or an excuse to bond with Luke. I’d known he was my mate—or one of them—for a while now.And I’d been in love with him since I was a girl. It was just hard to get past the knowledge that he’d lived all those years knowing I was his mate, but not stopping the abuse the pack’s Enforcers and the Alpha had heaped on me.
If anyone tried to hurt one of my mates, I would stop at nothing to make sure they couldn’t make a second attempt. He said he’d protected me, but it was hard to see when, or how exactly. Even if he’d been forbidden to shift, or to stop the beatings I took… I sighed and sat back down, wondering if I could forgive him. I knew I’d need to before we went any further.
“Has she seen you without your shirt?” Glen asked. I thought he was teasing Luke about being shy, until he added, “Has she seen the scars?”
“Of course not.” Luke whispered the answer, as my mind spun, trying to remember if I’d ever seen him with his shirt off. I’d seen his abs, for sure. I’d stabbed him in them. I’d seen him shirtless from a distance over the years, but I’d never had the chance to get an up-close look.
Come to think of it, Luke had almost always kept his shirt on. And he hadn’t been allowed to shift for so long, meaning he’d never really run around without clothes at all. More than once, I’d wondered what he looked like under his clothes, and been disappointed that I never even got a glimpse of his human form right after a shift.
I’d felt his skin the night before, in the storm drain. And there had been some places on his shoulders that had felt bumpy. I’d just assumed he had mud or something stuck to him, making his skin feel uneven. Could they have been scars?
Glen was whispering, now, too. “You should let her. I don’t think she really knows what you went through. That Callaway whipped you with silver, and why.”
“Does it matter?”
Glen’s voice was pitched loud enough for me to hear it, and I could feel in the bond that he wanted me to pay attention. He knew I was listening. “That he was going to whip her with it if you didn’t stop trying to protect her? Yeah, it fuckingdoes.”
Luke’s answer was so quiet, I almost couldn’t hear it. “I don’t want her to pity me. If she claims me, I want it to be because she thinks I deserve her love. Not that I do.”
“Not that any of us do, brother,” Glen said. I heard cards being put down, and a second later, Glen was standing behind me. He tilted me and the whole chair back, balancing it on the back two legs, and kissed me upside down, his stubble tickling my nose until I batted him away.
“Do it right, you goofball,” I grumbled, and he grinned, plucking me out of the chair entirely and setting me down on the table. I still only had on the t-shirt and a pair of boxers, and the laminate top was cold on my butt. “What are you doing?”
When Glen sat down on the chair where I’d just been, and wrapped his hands around my thighs like he was about to dig into his favorite meal, I had my answer. “I’m doingyou.Right. Like you asked.” He set his face over the seam of the boxers and growled, sending vibrations to my core.
“Oh yuck, not on the table,” I groaned, trying to wriggle away and failing.
Glen wiggled his eyebrows and leered from between my legs. “We’re leaving tonight. Why not go out with a bang? One last perfect meal?”
I almost laughed. Glen’s bright spirit in our bond was like sunshine in the darkness. Once we left here, we’d be in the cavern with Sergeant and the others, and I sure as heck wasn’t going to be doing anything with my mother and great-uncle listening in. I half-wanted to let Glen have his kinky way with me right there. But over his shaggy blond head, I could see Luke,standing beside the sofa, his arms folded, and his eyes filled with longing.
“I think you’re right,” I said, leaning over and pressing a gentle kiss to Glen’s mouth, then his cheek. I whispered in his ear, hoping he understood, “But you’ll have to wait your turn.”
The surge of joy in the bond made it clear Glen not only understood, but that this was exactly what he wanted. A split second later, a distant echo of that happiness trickled through the bond with Brand. And then, as if a wire were sparking, then dying down, Finnick’s connection with me flared to life before it was choked off again.
Glen kissed me more deeply before he let me go. “As you wish.”
33
A Perfect Moment
LUKE
I’d always thought Flor was the most graceful shifter I’d ever known. But her strength and self-assurance practically radiated from her now as she approached me. She stopped a few inches away, her amber eyes almost glowing. I would have believed the almost-cool expression she wore, if her cheeks hadn’t flushed before she spoke.
“Luke,” she began, then swallowed.
