Page 60 of Double or Nothing
“Thank you,” he says softly, taking my hand in his. “It means more to me than you’ll ever know.”
“You don’t have to sleep inside the house either,” I say. “I’m sorry if you felt pressured by us to do that. It must be awful for you, sharing a bed not only with me, but the other guys too sometimes. Between my constant tossing and turning, and their snoring, it’s a miracle you’re still functioning.”
He chuckles softly. “No, believe it or not, I’ve been able to sleep just fine with all of us piled up like a litter of puppies in your bed. Isn’t that strange? It doesn’t make sense.”
“Maybe you’re so worn out by the time we all go to bed that you don’t have the energy to stay awake and stare at the ceiling,” I tease, trying to lighten the mood. “Or maybe, the demons inside you affect you more when you’re alone.”
“Maybe,” he replies. “But either way, I don’t want my issues to affect you. That wouldn’t be right. You have enough on your plate as it is and you sure as hell don’t need to worry about my fucking issues. You should go back inside to your comfortable bed and rest. I’ll be fine out here, I swear.”
“Nope, not going anywhere,” I argue. “That would mean crawling back out into the cold with bare feet. Not going to happen.”
“Will you promise to rest if you stay?” he asks, a mixture of concern and tenderness in his words. “I don’t want to be the one responsible for keeping you awake all night.”
“I swear,” I promise.
We lay there in the darkness, wrapped tightly in each other’s arms, the connection between us deepening with every heartbeat. Instead of the night being a place of fear, tonight it’s a sanctuary, a place where we can be honest and vulnerable, and possibly heal together.
“Vulcan? Are you asleep?” I whisper a few minutes later, still wide awake.
“No, of course not,” he replies. “What’s wrong?”
“Tell me the name of your foster parent, the man who hurt you.”
“Why?” he asks.
“So I can destroy him and everything he cares about.”
He stiffens, his breath catching. “He’s dead,” he finally says, his voice cold and hard. “I took care of him to make sure he could never hurt another child.”
“Good,” I say, relieved the man is dead. “You did what you had to do. I just wish you didn’t have to go through that alone. If he was still alive, I would’ve gladly destroyed him in revenge for you. I wish I could do that for you, but I’m very glad he’s rotting in the ground.”
“You’re here now,” he says. “That’s all that matters. You’re here, and you understand, and you don’t judge me. You accept me the way I am.”
“Yes, and I would never change a thing,” I whisper. “I want you just the way you are. You’re perfect for me.”
He buries his head in my shoulder and tightens his arms around me. “I love you, Jade,” he murmurs. “I just want you to know in case anything ever happens to me.”
“And I love you. So don’t you dare ever let anything happen to you.”
Slowly, as the night wears on, I hear what I’m waiting for: the sound of his breathing slowing and deepening in sleep.
Only then do I allow my eyes to close.
26
JADE
“How did it go at Platinum today?” Seven asks when he arrives back at the house after his show.
He walks over to give me a kiss and then sinks down wearily at the kitchen table to watch me. Vulcan and Kit have both texted me to say they’re on their way home too, and I’m heating pizza for a midnight snack.
“Good,” I reply, leaning down to pull the pizza out of the oven. “We’re ready for the test run.”
“When are you doing it?” Seven asks.
“Tomorrow night,” I answer. “When I met with Eva and Natasha this morning, we agreed to keep it simple. If we run into any issues, we can fix them and do another trial run. Christmas Eve is ten days away, so we have plenty of time to get this right.”
“Are you sure you’re up for this so soon? You were completely exhausted when you came back home yesterday. I thought you would want to sleep for a week after coding non-stop.”
