Page 35 of Blood
I nod. “Understood.”
I turn toward the door. Everleigh stands, waiting uncertainly.
“Go, baby.” I nudge her toward the door.
Toward freedom, and our future.
27
Everleigh
Myapartmentistrashed.Wolf and I came back here to get some more of my things, but there might not be much that’s salvageable. We grabbed a few clothes yesterday. We didn’t have the time, or the heart, to tackle the rest. I look around, but at a glance, I can’t see anything that’s still intact.
I’m not sure if the people who did this were searching for something, or just out for revenge. If their goal was to hurt me, they succeeded.
The second-hand coffee table is on its side. The framed art prints that I’d painstakingly searched out at garage sales have been ripped off the walls. My favorite Curtis Sittenfeld novel, the one I have in paperback and hardcover, is ruined, both copies torn to shreds. I can barely recognize it by the colors of the torn pieces. My jewelry box is on its side. I don’t really have anything worth stealing. Even my mother’s engagement ring wasn’t worth taking, although it looks like they stole it anyway.
The ring wasn’t anything fancy—it wasn’t even a real diamond. It looks real at first glance, and either way it was gorgeous. It’s just one more piece of her that I’ve lost.
I still have her locket, of course. I might not have had clothes when I was at Wolf’s cabin, but I had the necklace. I’ve barely taken it off since she gave it to me six months before the car accident, only removing it to shower. Since she died, I haven’t removed it at all.
The missing engagement ring bothers me more than I thought it would. I suppose it doesn’t matter anyway now. The future I’d planned is gone.
It’s strange to see the life you’d mapped out in your mind disappear. I’d been so convinced of the future ahead of me that it seemed real. They say don’t count your chickens before they hatch. I always bought more into the idea of manifesting your destiny, or something like that. But the only thing that’s manifested for me in the past year is clarity of how far my ideal is from my current reality.
The only family I had left turned on me. I’m reminded now more than ever, looking at my trashed apartment, that I’m barely hanging on with the gigs I’ve pieced together. I guess it’s a blessing that I didn’t have a full-time job I had to show up to. I would have been fired when I missed work while I was busy being a hostage.
In the end, I’m able to gather a few trash bags worth of clothing, a partially intact photo album, and several pairs of shoes. I also took the two textbooks that weren’t destroyed. I may have dropped out for now, but maybe someday they’ll come in handy to finish my degree.
Wolf waits patiently without speaking while I gather the few items I can salvage. I offer a smile, trying to hide the fact that I feel like my entire life has been ripped away. I can’t afford to be nostalgic.
I try for a happy tone, or at least neutral. “Well, looks like that’s it! At least it’ll be easy to carry, right? You ready to go?”
Wolf holds my eyes, seeing right through my false cheer. “I’m sorry, baby. We’ll replace what we can. I know there’s a lot that can’t be replaced. I wish I could fix that for you.”
It’s both reassuring and terrifying that he can read me so easily. No one else has ever truly seen me the way he does. Tears spring to my eyes. I blink them back, but then he gathers me in a hug. His strong arms wrap all the way around me. His chest is warm, and he smells amazing. Not the sweat and musk that I was used to smelling at the cabin; now the clean smell of Irish Spring mixes with the sandalwood and cedar of whatever he rubs into his beard.
I bury my face in him. He stands there, unmoving. Just holding me. I’ve never been a hugger. With family, maybe, but in general it always made me feel trapped, too close to the other person and unable to get away.
This embrace is different. It consumes me completely, and instead of feeling ensnared by it, I feel safe. It feels right, somehow, being with Wolf.
It feels like home.
The thought jars me a bit. All of this is so fast. It’s not the way I planned, not even close. There’s been no dating. No courtship. No sweet first kiss on the front porch, or even on the doorstep of my crappy apartment building. We dove right in to the most fucked-up relationship ever, and it’s perfect. It might not be the future I imagined, but it’s real.
Now, I’m terrified that I’m going to do something to ruin it.
28
Everleigh
Mycheekboneisfinallyhealed, or at least well on its way. Most of the bruising has gone down over the last two weeks. It doesn’t hurt as much, which is good. The pain pills helped at first, but now it seems like they’re just making me nauseous. Wolf says in a few days I shouldn’t need them anymore at all. I’m ready to be done with the vague nausea that’s seemed to get worse over the last week or so.
Everything is getting back to normal. A new normal, at least.
I’ve been living with Wolf for now. He doesn’t like the idea of me being on my own, but maybe with time he’ll come around. Once he’s sure I’m safe, perhaps my nagging will buy me some independence. Then again, this is Wolf. He’s not swayed easily.
He met with Dante alone a few days after we met with him together. He won’t tell me what they talked about. All he’ll say is that everything is okay now. That the two of them found common ground. And I believe him. I don’t trust easily, and you’d think I’d have even more trust issues after everything that’s happened in the last month. But Wolf has been the one constant through all of it.
