Page 126 of Ashes
Say it.
I took a shuddering breath and finally said the words I’d been holding onto for far too long. “I love you,” I whispered in the air we shared.
I was in love with a man who had forced me to marry him and I would do it all over again if it meant this was the ending. I’d always believed that true love wasn’t in the cards for me, but Jamal showed me it was.
He pulled back and his eyes widened. He stood so still,I couldn’t tell if he was even breathing. But I’d finally confessed it. So I repeated it.
“I love you.”
His gaze burned into mine and I held my breath, anticipation bubbling in my veins. His fingers reached up to tuck my hair behind my ear, but instead of reciprocating my words, he tipped my face up to his and kissed me.
I couldn’t help but feel the hint of sadness that washed over me, but I pushed it aside and opened my mouth to let him in. His hand reached the back of my head and he pulled me closer.
Our kiss was slow, our heads moving in sync with each other, our tongues tangling gently together. He hadn’t said it back, but I could feel the unspoken words through his kiss.
I just hoped I wasn’t wrong.
It’d been two weeks since I’d been discharged and the relief I’d felt when they announced it was one of the sweetest.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I loved being at the hospital. It was one of my favorite places to be, but Ihatedbeing there as a patient. After the third day of sitting in a bed, doing nothing, I felt like I was losing my mind with boredom.
The only distraction I’d gotten had been when Kai andValentina would visit. Valentina only sat in the corner of my room, typing away on her laptop, but Kai made sure I got some entertainment while stuck in a hospital room.
They’d wanted to keep me under observation a little longer, but I’d informed them that I was ready to leave and even felt well enough to return to work. They’d been opposed to it at first, but since I was a doctor too, they’d trusted my opinion and given me the green light after my cardiac and blood tests came back normal.
I’d called my sisters as soon as I was lucid enough to have a conversation, not wanting them to worry more than they already were. Iris had cried a little when she saw my face during our video chat, but I continuously reassured her that I was fine.
Jamal had called my parents when we walked into the hospital and they’d asked to come and visit, but he’d asked them to wait until he got my permission once I woke up.
I’d told him that I wasn’t ready to face either of them, especially my father. Besides, if my mother visited, I’d spend the whole time she was here taking care of her and quieting her cries.
And I just didn’t have the energy for it, so Jamal had called them back and told them it would be better if they waited for me to reach out.
I didn’t know when Iwouldbe ready, but for once, I had a choice.
Esra and Kenna had shown up the next day after Jamal had called them to tell them I was in the hospital. They’dshowered me with food and for some unknown reasons socks, courtesy of Esra. I appreciated the gesture, but who needed ten pairs of new socks while at the hospital? But that was Esra for you.
I’d initially wanted to keep what had happened to me a secret for their own safety, but it was for the same reasons that I’d told them. They’d found a body amidst the remains of the warehouse, but because of the explosion, it took them longer than expected to identify the body.
We both knew who it was, but we didn’t want to explain to the authorities or the fire marshal what had actually happened.
All they knew was that Jamal and I were visiting the warehouse for a potential business venture of his when we found ourselves stuck in the fire. They hadn’t asked more questions, especially when their superiors called to tell them to let it go.
Guess it helped when your husband had connections.
Speaking of which, in the time I’d been back home, Jamal hadn’t left my side. Literally.
But despite being together so often, he felt distant. He kept our conversations short and barely touched me unless it was absolutely necessary. When I’d asked what was wrong, he gave me the same excuse every time.
“You’re still recovering.”
I’d tried to object, but he just kept shutting me down. His behavior didn’t help with the small doubt that had sprouted the night I’d told him I loved him.
What if he doesn’t feel the same?
Today was my first day back at work and I’d never been more grateful for a busy ER to keep my mind off things. I was leaving a patient’s room when one of the nurses, Isabella, intercepted me on my way to another patient.
“Someone’s here for you,” she informed me. “They’re in the waiting room.”
