Page 106 of Burdens
It still felt surreal that just five weeks ago I’d given birth to Ameena. I still was wrapping my head around the fact that I was a mother.
I’d always wanted kids, but with how my life had turned out, I’d never thought it would be possible.
But life always had ways of surprising you when you least expected it.
Noah and I had just bought our house here in Sardenya and been married for almost two years when two pink lines had changed my life.
I’d stood there in the small bathroom of a gas station because I’d thrown up for the third time that day. I’d decided to take a test, thinking nothing of it, until it had come back positive.
I’d shaken the test a few times, thinking the lines would fade away or my imagination would stop playing tricks on me. But the reality had remained unchanged—I had still been pregnant.
I’d always envisioned that I’d plan this elaborate reveal and surprise Noah if that had ever happened. Yet in that moment, all I’d wanted was to have him by my side.
So I’d immediately called him and waited anxiously for him in my car.
He’d dropped everything at work and had shown up less than ten minutes later, since I had just left the office when I had to pull over and use the bathroom.
The moment he’d thrown my car door open, I’d brandished the test in his face, unable to say the words because I had still been overcome with so many emotions.
Ihadbeen happy, but I’d also been so fucking scared. My mind had kept reeling around my fear that I wouldn’t be good enough for our child.
My parents had left us when I was barely a kid myself and I didn’t know what it was like to have good parents.
But all of my nerves had dimmed when Noah’s hands cupped my cheeks and he’d assured me that we could do this.
That together we’d raise our baby with every ounce of love we had in us. Because if two people could love each other the way we did, then we would always do our best to make sure our baby would be a part of it.
And every day since then, he’d shown me exactly that.
A few days after I’d given birth, we’d come home and spent the last few weeks on our own getting adjusted to our new routine of three.
My sister had flown to Sardenya, where we now lived, the week following Ameena’s birth to stay and help Noah and me around the house and anything I’d needed. But she’d only been able to stay for a week since she had her own little family to take care of.
Although the past five weeks had been the best weeks of my life, I wasexhausted.
I sighed. “But we’ve barely slept over the last month, and Ameena isfinallyasleep. This would be a great time to catch up on some hours of our own,” I countered.
“I would love to take you up on that offer, but I think they’d notice if we were both gone. Besides, we haven’t seen any of them since they left the hospital after you gave birth.”
I hated when he was right. We hadn’t seen our friends in over a month and theywerehere to celebrate Ameena.
Theo, Sofia, Jamal, and Sienna were all seated around the large half-moon sofa set at the back end of the courtyard, with food scattered on the wooden round table in front of them.
Theo and Jamal were engaged in a deep argument over god knows what, while Sienna held a phone between her and Sofia, most likely watching those strangely shaped cars she loved to watch race.
Sofia seemed lost to whatever Sienna was explaining to her every once in a while, but an amused smile played on her lips whenever Sienna jolted from her seat.
Meanwhile, Gabriel lay on a large blanket splayed on the grass a few feet away from them, playing with Theo and Sofia’s three-month-old daughter, Nesrine, and Jamal and Sienna’s four-year-old daughter, Selena.
On the other side of the garden, Kai and Valentina sat together at a small table. They’d just celebrated their first year of marriage a few months ago but were still exactly the same as when I’d met them that night a little over four years ago.
Although their relationship had come as no surprise to any of us, we’d pretended we had no idea when Kai had told us they were together.
They were playing chess, their favorite thing to do aside from bickering, and if the small smile playing on Valentina’s lips was any indication, she was about to win.
I was about to suggest to Noah we join the rest of the group when Selena left Gabriel’s side and barreled toward us.
“Tonton Noah,” she shouted before crashing into Noah’s legs. She circled her arms—or at least as much as she could—around his legs, squeezing.
