Page 12 of Burdens
Amalia fucking Abara.
1 Fuck.
CHAPTER 3
NOAH (PAST)
I knewI was in trouble the moment I laid eyes on her as she walked into the bar.
That she’d obliterate the first rule I’d given myself when I moved to Blackwell ten years ago the moment she sat a few seats down from me.
But in my defense, how could you look at this woman andnotwant to know more about her?
I’d tried my best to ignore her over the last thirty minutes, but it was impossible. Her presence alone sent my skin buzzing like it’d been electrocuted and revived all my senses back to life.
The bar was crowded for a Sunday night, but all I could focus on was her.
She was on her own and nursed whatever was in her glass quietly, occasionally chatting with the bartender, Andrea. She was wearing a high-waisted long green skirt and a black vest that revealed a sliver of her tanned midriff every time she shifted on her barstool.
Her dark brown hair cascaded down her back in waves and some pieces framed her face. I’d only caught a glimpse of her face, but it was enough to make my breathing stutter.
High cheekbones, pert nose with a tiny diamond stud piercing, and plump lips that begged to be devoured.
My mind wandered to thoughts of slowly peeling back her layers and exploring her with my lips, but I kept reminding myself I was here for one drink only before I turned in for the night like I always did.
When Jamal and I had moved here after the Bureau had dismissed me from his parents’ case, Theo had forced me to go out before my first day back at the academy, saying I needed to relax if I wanted the new recruits not to think I was an asshole with a stick up my ass.
I’d brushed him off and ignored his request until he’d shown up at my door saying he would watch over him while I went out.
I’d spent the entirety of that night staring blankly at an empty tumbler, thinking about how much my life had completely changed in a matter of weeks, how much more it was about to change.
I was becoming a guardian at the age of twenty-three. To a kid I’d barely known at the time aside from the occasional get-together his father had thrown every once in a while and forced me to attend because he’d thought it would be a good idea for me to socialize with the team instead of staying in my own corner.
At that point, all I’d known about Jamal was that I liked him, but I didn’t know the first thing about parenting. I wasn’t even sure Iwantedkids, especially with the type of father I grew up with.
I had millions of unanswered questions spinning in the back of my brain. What if I ended up being like my father? What if I became a bad figure to Jamal and fucked him up? Most importantly, what would happen to him if I didn’t accept guardianship?
The answer to my last question alone had overtaken my worries over the others. If I hadn’t, Jamal would have ended upin foster care and after everything his dad did for me, I couldn’t let that happen. Jamal was a good kid and he deserved as good of a childhood as he could get despite becoming an orphan so young.
Although I’d hated to admit it, Theo had been right. I’d needed that night away from everything to sift through my thoughts. There had been no time for that when I had to take care of a whole other human being. Jamal’s needs had immediately overtaken mine the moment Ayoub and Nina’s lawyers had called me to announce that I was now the sole responsible adult tasked to take care of their son.
So every year like clockwork, I showed up at Faro, nursed a single drink, and went home. I’d convinced myself that coming here the night before my first day was necessary. Besides, it was cheaper than therapy.
Faro wasn’t exactly my scene, but I was a man of routine. I liked predictable.
Andshewas anything but.
I mentally cursed myself. Why was I so intrigued about her? Nothing ever really captured my attention easily, but something about her just… I didn’t even know how to describe it.
The right thing to do would be to stay away from her and go to my place. Because if her presence alone was making me feel like there wasn’t enough oxygen in my lungs, getting closer, even just for one night, would be life-altering and the last thing I needed.
I forced myself to focus on finishing my drink and getting the hell out of here before I gave away to temptation. Except…
One last look wouldn’t hurt, right?
I chanced a sideways glance and expected her to be in the same position, hopefully oblivious to my admiration, but her seat was now empty.
“Are you going to keep staring all night, or will you do something about it?” a sultry voice murmured from my left.
