Page 19 of Maybe This Time
“Ezra?” His name had come out as a soft plea, tangled between uncertainty and something dangerously close to hope.
Hope I couldn’t afford to let grow roots.
“Yes,” he breathed, his voice simmering to a hush.
We were on the verge of a precipice and the single word seemed to tilt us toward a version of permanent change.
I wasn’t sure if I’d been the one who’d leaned closer or if he had, but our breaths mingled in the infinitesimal space between us. Over the years, we’d slept in the same beds, cuddled when I was cold, which was almost all the time, shared food, talked for hours on the phone, but we’d never beenthisclose.
I was a breath away from my lips brushing against his when the sound of my sister’s voice sliced through the night.
“Talya! Ezra! Are you guys up here?”
I jerked back like I’d been burned, stumbling away just as my sister’s head popped through the open window. I didn’t dare look at Ezra as I followed her back inside to talk to my aunt Fatima, mortified by the fact that I’d made a fool of myself.
I’d almost made the biggest mistake of my life and kissed my best friend the night before he left for another country. All because I couldn’t keep my feelings in check.
So for the rest of the night, I did what I’d done for years. I’d pretended like I didn’t feel anything for the boy next door and promised myself to never bring it up. Even when he came over the next morning with fresh blueberry danishes—my favorites—and asked to talk about the night before.
Instead, I’d swept us through the packed itinerary I’d organized for his last day, deflecting every prolonged glance and filling every moment of silence that stretched too long with nonsensical blabbering.
Then,when it was finally time for him to leave later that night for three impossibly long years in Paris, I’d given a friendly hug, smiled, and waved him off.
Only when I was in the sanctuary of my childhood bedroom, where pieces of Ezra clung to every corner of my room, did I finally let the tears I’d kept at bay fall and grieve what could have been.
CHAPTER 10
TALYA
I’d often wondered,would Ezra have kissed me if my sister hadn’t interrupted us?
Would years of pent-up longing and desire have finally led to something more?
Instead, after that night, we’d seamlessly slipped back to our normal, and I’d promised myself to never risk our friendship again. Because no matter how much we’d threaded the line over the years and hadalmostobliterated that night, I’d convinced myself it was better that way.
Safer.
I’d always been terrified of losing him and having Ezra in my life was worth more than the potential of a few seconds of bliss. But that was what happened when you let fear control you. It built walls and prevented you from taking risks that could lead to finally having what had always been within arm’s reach.
Except now I was done with holding back.
The fear I’d carried for years was swept away and replaced by the courage to do what I’d wished I’d done that night three years ago.
Ezra’s hand slid up to cup the back of my neck, his touch steady as he gently guided me forward until our foreheads rested against each other. I gripped his wrists, needing something to hold on to through the resulting drunken, dizzying rush of being this close to him.
His mouth hovered just inches from mine, and I leaned in, my lips softly brushing against his. The uncertainty of what would come next sent sparks skittering across my skin, while the familiar smell of his clean aftershave and vanilla-butter scent that always seemed to cling to him filled my lungs.
Ezra’s hooded gaze locked onto mine, his expression intent. I knew exactly what he was looking for, so I gave him a small nod.
That was all it took.
Ezra crashed his lips against mine without an ounce of hesitation, like he’d been waiting for my permission all his life.
Everything around us burst into technicolor. I’d been kissed before, but nothing would ever compare to how Ezra James was devouring me like I’d been the answer he’d been looking for. Like he was trying to breathe me in.
He kissed me with a desperation and starvation that matched my own, and I was burning everywhere. My hands gripped the front of his shirt, dragging him closer until there wasn’t any space left between us. I pressed my tongue against the seam of his lips and he opened up pleadingly, letting me lick my way into his mouth.
Our tongues brushed together in soft friction as he let out a gentle hum of pleasure that traveled down my spine and all the way to my toes. The kiss was frantic and with each muted moan of his against my lips, a single thought tore through me as we drank each other in.
