Page 109 of Cowboy Heat
I nod. “But not for the right reasons.”
“And Martha and Ray?”
“Not at all,” I admit. “It probably didn’t help that the media found out they didn’t believe me originally. A lot of people were hard on them, and well, that funneled down to me later. That’s when I went to meet Ryan. After that, I was on to a new placement.” I sigh. “Once we were out of the public eye, well, the story of our rescue started leaving a sour taste in a lot of people’s mouths. We were labeled as aggressive, having anger issues, violent tendencies. And if that wasn’t in our files, it was spread by word of mouth. The idea of a bunch of kids saving a little girl sounds sweet when you take out the baseball bats and the bludgeoning of a grown man with them. Deaton was a bad man, yeah, but he also had to have several surgeries before he went to prison. Not exactly an image you want when you’re staring at a bunch of pre-teen and teenaged boys. Maximus never lost track of us after that, no matter where we went. Then, when he aged out of care, he moved to be as near us as he could. That’s how we became a family. But Maximus believing me will always be what I’m most grateful for because, if not, I don’t know if I’d ever have tried to go back and find Sarah again.”
I’ve sidetracked some. Told more of the story than I meant to, but I have to admit something to her. Confess something that hurts.
“All of my brothers are haunted by something,” I say. “I’m haunted by the second time I ever saw Sarah, sitting in the corner of that basement. She recognized me, Kissy, and I knew then what she was thinking. Why did it take me so long to come back to get her? Andthathas been my burden to bear all these years. Why I raced ahead in Orlando. Why I went undercover to find the truth. Why I got blown up. It’s hard for me to wait because that one time, I waited too long, and that time meant a lot to Sarah Tate in that basement.”
Kissy’s words are gentle. “You were only a kid. It shouldn’t have been your burden to begin with. And the important thing is, you did right by her. Even if it took a day. You did good. You all did.”
I let go of her hand and roll onto my side.
It hurts.
I don’t mind.
Kissy’s still on her back, but she looks up into my eyes.
I hope she truly hears me.
“And you were just an unarmed woman going up against two men with weapons,” I say. “I can’t tell you what to feel, but I really hope you don’t feel anything but justified in what you did. You protected yourself. You protected me, and I haven’t said it yet, but thank you, Kissy. Thank you for saving me.”
I kiss her and marvel at how natural it feels, how she feels against me.
I’m not sure it’s the right moment though.
I start to pull away.
Kissy, however, lets me know she’s not on the same page.
She bucks up and catches my lips again before the space between them is too great. Her hands intertwine with my hair. She pulls me back to her. Not too hard, but not too gentle either.
I could stop.
I could back away.
I could point out that we’ve been through a lot in the past few days and our emotions are high, then I could politely say goodnight.
Yet here I am, realizing that once again Kissy is different.
I don’t want to let her go.
CHAPTERTHIRTY-FIVE
Kissy
There’s always beena part of me that clinches when the rain comes. Heavy rain. Storms that bare down on my world and remind me that I lost the two most important people in my life to something I could in no way control.
But thunder erupts outside and the rain starts hitting the roof above us hard.
Yet I…only feel him.
Beau’s hand has gone from my hair and is gripping my waist. His tongue explores my mouth and every part of me wants it to journey south. That should surprise me. How we went from talking tothisfeeling.
I need him.
Iwanthim.
