“Kenzie… Kenzie, I need your help.”
She inhales sharply and I can almost see her nodding her head in determination from here. I’ve always said I’d never see a shrink, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
“Anytime, T. My door is always open and you know I’ll always answer when you call. Or text you right back if I’m with a client.”
I exhale heavily as I feel the muscles in my shoulders loosen slightly.
I hate that I feel like I need help, but if anyone would understand, I know it would be Kenzie. And I also know she’d never repeat anything we discussed.
Chapter 24
Reaper
We’vebeeninForestCreek for almost a week and I’m itching to head back home. On Monday, I volunteered to go with Timber to check out Mae’s cabins on the land she’d inherited from her grandparents. Somehow they’d spotted us, but I don’t think they realized it was the club since it’s been quiet the last couple of days. We’re getting ready to head out, but I have another stop I need to make before I head home.
And a conversation to have.
Walking out in the main room, I spot Levi sitting on Thor’s lap as they sit on some of the couches as they talk to some of my brothers.
“Half-pint… Can I talk to you for a moment?”
She looks up at me, confused, most likely because of my hesitation.
“Yeah, Andre.” She carefully slides off Thor’s lap, and my hand shoots out to steady her when she wobbles slightly.
Half-pint caresses her stomach, and I try to contain my longing at her gesture, to have a child of my own. To have Lark’s stomach round with our child.
She gives me a rueful smile. “These babies make keeping my balance extremely difficult.” She pauses as she studies me for a moment.
Maybe I wasn’t fully concealing my emotions.
A moment later, she turns to Thor, and I swear they have a silent conversation before she gives a slight nod and smiles up at me.
“Let’s take this somewhere quieter.”
She starts walking toward Thor’s office, but something in Thor’s eyes keeps me in place as his assessing gaze studies my face.
“Just know that we’re here for you if you need us,” he says before he tilts his head in the direction of his office and where Levi walked off to. “You and yours are family.”
He gives me a chin lift as he turns back to Dragon, but it isn’t until I start following after Levi that my steps falter as another meaning hits me. At first, I thought he’d just meant the club, but does he know about Lark?
At his door, I make myself not look back at him, but suddenly, my skin crawls with unease.
I had thought I was hiding my warring emotions, but maybe I wasn’t.
“Andre, it’s okay. Come sit down and tell me what’s going on,” Half-pint says as she pats the cushions on the other end of the couch. She’s already turned in her seat so that she’s facing me.
Sitting down, I exhale heavily as I try to gather my thoughts.
“How did you do it?” I blurt out and internally I groan. I hadn’t wanted to start with this topic, but my mouth seems to have overridden my brain.
“Do what, Andre?”
“Your nightmares, night terrors. How did you overcome them?”
Her face softens but then her eyes turn haunted. “I’m not fully over them actually. While their frequency has gone down greatly, it still happens too many times for my liking. However, it’s my men that take the credit for getting me through them. They are the ones that are able to pull me out of the nightmares and then they hold me through what I call the shaky stage afterward.” She cocks her head as she studies me. “How bad have yours been? How frequent?”
I exhale heavily again as I scrub my face. “Almost every night.” I swallow thickly as memories bombard me. “I… I had wondered if that was the case, but mine…” I clear my throat. “I wanted to take that next step, but I had to know what it would be like for someone else so I… I set up a private camera so I could see the extent of them and how I act.”