Page 60 of Reaper
She gives me a small smile. “Hopefully it won’t get to that point but thank you for the offer.” She takes a sip of her tea and reaches for a pad of paper on the counter. “Now. Tell me what’s going on, T? You didn’t give me much information the other day other than you wanted to talk about your demons.”
Taking a deep breath, I tell her about the kidnapping and what Black Plague did to me and Levi. Thankfully, she doesn’t ask to see all of my scars, though I try not to react as her gaze bounces between the ones that are on my face, neck, and arms. Then I tell her about Lark.
When I get to Levi’s journals, she nods as she gives me a small smile. “I love that that method helped you. It’s similar to one that I often recommend as well.” She reaches across the table and grasps my hand. “You will get through this T, and I’ll be here to help you any way I can. Lark too, if she wants someone really discrete. Nothing we say will ever get documented permanently.” She pauses again as she raises her notepad. “This is as far as my documentation will go and it’s only for my reference for future talks. When you feel like you’re ready to discontinue therapy, they’ll get burned. In fact, you can burnthem in the same manner as you do for your black journal pages if you want.”
Once again, I exhale heavily, and a feeling of rightness has the knot in my chest loosening some. Hang in there, Lark. I’ll get my head on straight and then… then I’ll make my move.
Chapter 25
Lark
OneMonthLater~October 13th, 2023
Robotically, I clean the counter of the bar and as I turn to put the rag down, I see the door open in the mirrors behind the shelves and bottles of liquor. At first, I don’t think anything of it but then Reaper walks in and I freeze. However, unlike the usual group of them that comes in, tonight, it’s just him. It’s been almost two months since Reaper started distancing himself from me.
And I’ve hated every minute of it.
However, I also remember doing something similar, though not as drastic, so I haven’t stormed out to the clubhouse or his house to demand to know why.
Because I know why he’s shut down.
Ever since those assholes tortured Reaper and a woman he told me he claimed as a sister, Levi, he’s been treated differently around town. It’s like now there’s visible proof to the town members of how dangerous being a biker can be. Some townmembers are downright scared of him now, and others I’ve heard whispering and worrying about if the people who did that to Reaper will come to town and possibly hurt innocent people to get back at Reaper and the club.
However, judging by his posture and the look on his face, something’s changed.
Reaching under the counter, I pull out aSpotted Cow, his favorite beer because I have a feeling tonight is most likely not a whiskey night. Popping off the cap, I hand it to him as he settles on a bar stool. It doesn’t escape my notice that he takes the seat at the far end of the bar either, so that he’s further away from the other customers.
Erica, one of my bartenders, cocks an eyebrow in question and I minutely shake my head. At first, she’d been leery of the club coming here so much, but once she got to know them better, she started to relax around them. She also knows how much I’ve hated what the town members have put Reaper through as well as the distance it’s caused between us. However, I’m hoping that by him coming here, alone, that maybe that distance is about to be bridged.
Taking a deep breath, I refocus back on him and smile. “Hey, stranger.”
The corner of his lips lifts slightly and I silently give myself a high five as his posture relaxes a little.
Crap… Did he think that I was mad at him?
“Hey, Darlin’.”
Fuck, his gravelly, deep voice still sends a thrill through me and I’m glad I’m behind the counter so that he can’t see me clenching my thighs together. The fact that he’s still calling me his Darlin’ has hope rising that we’ll be able to work through whatever’s bothering him.
“I heard from some of the guys that there was some commotion at the dual wedding last month,” I whisper and cock an eyebrow in question. “Everyone safe?”
While Reaper didn’t tell me himself, I’d overheard that he and a few others headed back to Forest Creek to officiate at Levi, Thor, and Dragon’s wedding at the beginning of September. Also, there was a surprise proposal and Mae and Timber ended up getting married the same day as well. While I wish Reaper had been the one to tell me, I think the guys were also trying to keep me in the loop in their own way. Something I’ve been grateful for because it’s happened more than once.
He nods, his face turning grim. “Yeah, thank fuck.”
I can tell he wants to say more, but I won’t pry. He’s had the ‘club business’ talk with me and while I don’t like it, I can respect it all the same.
Reaper picks at the label on his bottle and takes a deep breath. “Darlin’, I’m so—”
I cut him off by reaching over the bar and placing a finger against his lips. His eyebrows raise in shock and I give him a small smile.
“You don’t need to say you’re sorry because I could tell by the look on your face when you came in here that you’ve been beating yourself up over this. If you recall, I had a rough spell as well and did something similar.” I pause, my shoulders dropping. Clearing my throat, I purposefully say this next bit quietly in the hope that no one overhears us. “It isn’t right what they’re doing to you, and I’m sure that’s fucking with your head big time. I’m here for you, just… just don’t put distance between us again. It killed me when you started going radio silent and then kept silent.”
The muscles in his hands, arms, and shoulders tense for a moment before that tension visibly leeches out of his muscles as well as his posture. He scrubs a hand over his face and fuckdo I wish we were alone because then I’d pull him toward me and kiss him, showing him that I don’t mind his scars at all. Even when he started going radio silent, I kept sending him texts each morning and night. Every now and then, I’d text him about something that happened or an accomplishment. I had hoped the distance was temporary and I wanted him to know that I was still thinking of him despite that distance.
“You don’t know how much I needed to hear that.” He takes a drink and nods. “You’re right, though. All of that sent me into a major tailspin but when my niece, Mae, and Timber were here before their wedding, she knocked some sense into me. Told me…”
He pauses and bites his lip as he stares at the bottle, picking at the label again. After a few moments, he clears his throat and his gaze rises to meet mine again.
