Page 35 of One Step Behind
‘Sorry, yes, you did tell me that.’
We stand awkwardly for a moment and I feel Rachel staring at me. Pitying me, it feels like. Then she steps around the car and opens the driver’s door.
‘Well, anytime I can help with Tracey, please just ask,’ I call after her.
‘It’s Lacey,’ Beth hisses from beside me. I glance down at my daughter. Her face is shiny-red from jumping, but it’s her eyes that startle me. They are narrowed and fierce and directed straight at me in a how-dare-you kind of way.
‘Take care of yourself, Jenna,’ Rachel calls, giving a quick wave before sliding back into her car. I watch her pull away, taking the speed bump in the road too fast. Did I imagine it, or was there a knowing tone to her voice just then? I picture Rachel and Christie huddled around the table in the cafe. How quickly would their chit-chat about husbands and kids have veered into gossip?
‘Did you hear about Beth’s mum? She’s got a stalker. Can you believe it?’
‘No wonder she looked so dreadful on the school run this week.’
My face smarts thinking of what they might have said, but then I force it away. Christie wouldn’t gossip about me. She’s too nice.
‘How was the party?’ I ask, looking between Beth and Archie as I open the front door.
‘Great,’ Archie replies with a grin. ‘I bumped my head and had to have an ice pack,’ he tells me, beaming with pride as he points to a purplish bruise on his cheek.
‘Oh you poor baby. Did it hurt?’ I reach out and pull his body close to my side as the guilt jabs again. I should’ve been there.
‘Only for a minute. Christie looked after me. She said I’d have a shiner in the morning. What’s a shiner?’
‘It’s a bruise around the eye.’ I stare at Archie for a moment, looking beyond the smile and the bright eyes for any sign of sadness, but all I see is the chocolaty ice-cream ring around his mouth and a boy who’s had a fun time.
Beth gives a loud sigh, kicking off her shoes in the hall and leaving them scattered in the place they fall. When she speaks her voice is snappish. ‘It was great until you forgot to pick us up.’
‘I didn’t forget,’ I say, nudging her shoes to one side with my foot. One battle at a time. ‘And I am sorry.’
‘No, you’re not.’ She launches herself up the stairs, her feet stomping harder with every step.
‘Hey, what’s the commotion?’ Stuart asks, appearing from the kitchen. His hair is dishevelled, his face sleepy and bronzed from the sun.
‘It’s nothing,’ I reply.
‘Mummy forgot to pick us up,’ Archie crows as he jumps into Stuart’s arms.
‘Hey kiddo, had a good time?’ Stuart asks, flashing me a quizzical look.
‘I didn’t forget. Christie was going to drop them home, but Niamh got sick and she had to rush off. I couldn’t get back in time so Lacey’s mum, Rachel, dropped them home.’
‘That was nice of her. I thought you were going to stay at the party?’
‘It was a drop-off thing. No one was staying.’
‘I hit my head,’ Archie says. ‘Can I have a drink?’
‘What do you need to say?’ Stuart tips Archie upside down and tickles his belly as he walks to the kitchen.
‘Please, please,’ Archie cries out in between his giggles.
I reach into my bag for my phone to reply to Christie’s text. My finger catches on something sharp and I feel the sting of blood. I pull out my hand and suck the thin cut on my index finger before looking more carefully inside my bag. It’s then that I see the smashed screen of your iPhone and your door keys resting on top of my diary. I had them in my hands when Sophie arrived and must have dumped them in my bag without realizing.
‘Are you going to check on Beth?’ Stuart calls out.
I nod, leaving my bag by the door and walking up the stairs.
Beth’s curtains are still drawn from last night and she’s lying on her bed. The air is stuffy and hot. I remember painting her bedroom one day when she was at school – a birthday surprise. The walls are white except one, which is a bright turquoise.Fairy-light stars dangle over her bookshelves, and on the floor beneath the piles of clothes, books, pens, notebooks, teddies and toys is a black-and-white zebra-pattern rug.
