Page 63 of The Sun Will Rise
I drove past Katy’s house last night on my way to pick up Paloma, before we met Katy, Jay, Amie, and Cam for dinner, and her front gate was overshadowed by a large, imposingFor Salesign. Last night, I could fool myself that it was outside someone else’s house, but the way the flag loomed above my head as I crossed the threshold from street to front path felt far too much like the end of an era. It somehow feels all the more real to have walked past it in close proximity.
“So, tell me more about selling up,” I demand. We’ve barely settled in Katy’s living room. She’s opened the window, letting the warm summer air filter into the room and the sound of traffic mingles with our voices.
“Well…” Katy runs a finger around the rim of her coffee mug. “With Pup—I mean, Jay’s studio is too small for a dog. And this place… I mean, I love it. I bought this house and I did it up and I love it. But I bought it when it was just me, and now it’s not just me anymore, and—”
“So you are looking for somewhere together?”
“I think so,” Katy whispers. “I mean, we’re not—we haven’t—we haven’t made any decisions. We haven’t even looked at anything. I meant it when I said we wanted to get an idea of the market first. Maybe we’ll end up staying here for a while, who knows.”
She looks at me with fear in her eyes, like at any moment I might snap and ruin everything we’ve just tentatively repaired. I reach across the sofa and pull her hand towards me, gripping it as hard as I dare.
“I mean it too, K. I want you to be happy. And if my dumb brother makes you happy, then I’m okay with it.” Katy smiles at me, sniffling and swiping at the tears filling her eyes. “And anyway, I wanna hear more about the dog.”
“No way, missy,” Katy laughs, still wiping her eyes. “You just went back to Austin. Don’t think you’re getting out of telling meeverything.”
“I can’t wait for you to meet him, K,” I say. The words come out in a whisper, a torrent of emotion stealing my voice and my breath as I think back to my most recent visit. I only stayed for a little over two days, but it was worth every second of those two ten-hour flights, and the resulting jet lag. “I lov… I love him.”
Katy’s eyes shine brightly. She shuffles along her sofa until she’s right beside me, and she pulls me into another long hug.
“I’m so happy you’ve found someone, Roo,” she says into my hair. “He seems like he’s really good for you. I can’t wait to meet him.”
“Can I ask you something? Like, personal?” I say once we’ve pulled apart.
“Of course, Roo. You know you can always ask me anything.”
“Have you ever—wait. No. I really don’t think I want to have this conversation,” I decide, changing my mind mid-sentence. “As much as I’m okay with you and Jay, I don’t think—this isn’t something I want to know.”
“Roo?” Katy places a hand on my knee, subtly distracting me from my rambling. “What is it?”
“Butt stuff. Have you ever…?”
Katy snorts with laughter before clapping a hand over her mouth. Her cheeks flush the same pink as her socks.
“Yes,” she says slowly, after taking a moment to compose herself. “I… have. Is it something you’re considering?”
“It’s something I—we—did.Last week. I mean… we did.”
“Okay. And… did you enjoy it? How do you feel about it now?”
“Katy, are you going to answer everything with‘and how does that make you feel?’now, because if you do…”
“Ha ha,” she says. “For real, Roo. It’s different. Kinda. Like, regular sex is one thing, but…”
“Butt.”
“You’re such a dick.” She leans in and nudges me with her shoulder.
“You love dick.”
“Yeah, I do.”
“I think I’m okay with it. I mean—the butt thing, not the you loving dick. Although that’s fine too. I mean… oh, for fuck’s sake.”
“Take a breath, love.” She’s fucking smirking.
“It was… fine. I guess. I mean, I enjoyed it. Maybe not as much as the regular kind, but it was… anyway. Can we talk about something else?”
“If you want.”
