Page 37 of Home in the Country
The sound of an engine catches my attention, and I steel myself for what’s about to happen. Otto eases down the dirt road like he’s in no particular hurry while I’m crawling out of my skin with nerves.
The logo for the company he and his brother Case run is displayed on the side—Twinscapes—and it almost makes me smile. They’ve made a name for themselves in the community, and I couldn’t be more proud even if I have no right to be.
Otto’s expression is cautious as he parks and makes his way over to me, and I see the hope disappear from his eyes as we stare at each other.
“You wanted to talk?”
I guess I’ll just get to it then.
“Yeah, okay.” I swallow and tuck a piece of hair behind my ear. I’ve had to recite this story countless times, but the tension between us makes it feel like I’m living through it again.
Otto sighs. “What happened, Fallon?”
It shouldn’t disappoint me that he doesn’t call mePrincessbut it does.
“Not long after I went home that day we were together, I got a call from my roommate’s parents at school. She,”—I swallow down the lump in my throat and fight back tears—“she’d been killed in a hit-and-run accident right off campus.
“Most people would probably have had the opposite reaction than I did, like they wouldn’t be able to be where they lost someone but I…I threw myself into everything.”
Otto’s shoulders visibly sag as he watches me. He doesn’t move to comfort me, but it’s still progress.
“I wanted to be involved in the investigation. I wanted updates and I organized a candlelight vigil and a memorial run—literally anything I could to keep her at the forefront of everyone’s mind.”
“No one could fault you for that; you were grieving.”
“Not even you?” I try for levity but it falls flat.
“Not even me.” His smile is weak in return, but again…progress.
“It consumed me, and then one day like a year and a half later I got a call that they’d arrested the guy who had done it. It was a relief and justcripplingall at the same time, you know? I’d dedicated all my time to Shelby and making sure she got justice and was remembered and—” I swallow.
“And so when some other friends invited me to a party, I saidyesbecause it felt like something to be celebrated. Tanner was visiting some friends while he was on leave from the military, and we just connected in an easy, fun way.”
I shrug because I know Otto doesn’t want to hear about me sleeping with another man, but itisrelevant to the story.
“It wasn’t like red-hot passion or anything. It was more likehey I think havin’ sex sounds like fun and I bet we’d be good at it.You know that sort of thing.”
“Fallon…” Otto growls my name, and a shiver races down my spine.
“Yeah, so we hooked up and he went back to base and we talked casually, and then I missed my period and we made the decision to give Briggs the best possible life.”
“Not everyone gets married just because they’re havin’ a kid. You would have had family and support here if you came home.”
“Tanner and I were never right for each other, but I love him and he loves me. He’s my best friend, and we’re still going to give Briggs the best life we can.”
Otto rears back like I slapped him.
“You said you were divorced.”
“I am. Just because you love someone doesn’t mean you’rein lovewith them, Otto. I can’t regret my life with Tanner because I know with every fiber of my being that I was meant to be Briggs’s mom. I haven’t always done the right thing but I’m tryin’—Lord, am I tryin’. My son—he’s saved me in so many ways.”
“I just—” He runs his hand roughly through his hair before he looks at me again. “Why didn’t you call me? Even to tell me to fuck off would have been better than radio silence all these years.”
It’s my turn to look away now, because this part hurts the most. It’s the one piece I never got over no matter how many hours of therapy I attended.
“Shelby asked me to stay at school the weekend I came here to see you. She told me I was being ridiculous for not wanting to binge watchGilmore Girlsfor the second time.”
I give him a watery smile right before he crushes me to his chest and wraps me so tight in his arms I can barely breathe.
