Page 59 of Home in the Country
OTTO
Isomehow get roped into staying for dinner and helping Fallon clean up the kitchen after Briggs goes to sleep. It shouldn’t be this easy, this natural, with her but it is, and it’s fucking with my head.
This house feels like a home in a way that living with Case never has. Sure, it’s ours, and we’ve remodeled it over time so it’s nice, but it doesn’t feel like this. There’s no smell of freshly baked cookies or pictures and toy trucks strewn across every available surface.
And it didn’t escape my notice that the carnations I dropped off are still going strong in their colored water. Looking around one last time, I know I’ve got to leave before I beg her to let me stay.
“I’m going to head out. Thanks for trusting me with Briggs. I had a great time with him.”
“Thank you for being so wonderful with him.” She smiles. “He can be a lot, but his heart is so big and he’s just so awesome.”
“He is. Thanks again for today.”
Scooping my keys up, I walk to the door and open it. I can’t stand lookin’ at her in my shirt for one more minute knowin’ she isn’t mine.
“I’ll walk you out.”
“You don’t have to; it’s already pretty late.”
It isnotlate, but dammit, I need to get out of here.
Following me out onto the front porch, Fallon calls my name.
“Hey Otto?”
I don’t want to turn around but I do—my self-preservation is absolute shit.
“What, Fallon?”
“What if I wanted to ask you out on a date?”
“No.”
The word is out of my mouth before I can even process it.
“How come?” Her voice is soft andsad,but hell, I’m sad too.
I close the distance between us and then point toward the house behind her.
“Because I would rather have that little boy in my life than be some guy you’re fuckin’. I don’t want to lose him. He’s amazing, and if the choice is to spend time with him or get you naked whenyoufeel like it then it’s no choice.”
She rears back like I slapped her.
“I haven’t even taken you out on a date. You didn’t want it, and I went along with it, but I won’t be your dirty little secret.”
“What? How could you even say that I—”
I glare at her, and she presses her lips together.
“More importantly, you gave meoneafternoon with him and I fell so damn hard. I know I have no right to ask, but please don’t take that away from me.”
“Jesus, Otto…You weren’t…I don’t want to just fuck you. That’s not what I want.” Her eyes are glassy, and she looks up and blinks rapidly before speaking again. “I want to try with you.”
I stare off into the distance and start counting to calm down but lose my place and have to start over. My brain is at war with my body, but ultimately, fierce possession wins out.
I back her against the front door and cage her in with my body. Her eyes widen and she swallows hard.
“I’m out of my damn mind.” I growl each word for emphasis.
