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VIENNA: Why can’t we talk about Aspen?

MONTANA: She’s next

ASPEN: Oh goodie

MONTANA: Y’all threatened to get on a plane and fly home when things went south with Ellison

VIENNA: I still stand by that

ASPEN: Fine

ASPEN: Phoenix and I are sleeping together

MONTANA: I’m gonna have to bleach my eyeballs after this conversation

VIENNA: You asked

MONTANA: You could have texted the right chat

ASPEN: Anyway…

ASPEN: Vienna what’s going on with Wells?

VIENNA: Besides the orgasms?

MONTANA: Yes

MONTANA: You can get orgasms anywhere

ASPEN: I’ve never heard you sound more like a MAN than right now

VIENNA: I’m so disappointed in you

MONTANA: I’m confused

ASPEN: There is a vast number of men out there thinking they’re good at pleasuring a woman and absolutely oblivious to where her clit is

VIENNA: Amen sister

VIENNA: Also he definitely knows where my clit is and I love him

MONTANA: I’m sorry DID YOU SAY YOU LOVE HIM?

MONTANA: I’ve never met him and you love him?

ASPEN: I met him—he’s very nice

VIENNA: Not helping

ASPEN: Also you didn’t comment on Wells’s ability to find Vienna’s clit, big brother

MONTANA: Aaaand I’m officially done with this conversation.

VIENNA: We love you!

MONTANA: Remember that when I show up on your doorstep unannounced

ASPEN: What?