Page 63 of Meant to be Falling
“I’m not running and this…me,”—she waves her hand around—“is a lot. I have baggage and not that we’ve talked about it, but I’m done having kids, Mason. And you’re just starting to navigate your twenties. You should have the chance to make your own family and?—”
“I had a vasectomy the day I turned eighteen, Lana.” The words are booming in the quiet room, her mouth hanging open as she gapes at me. “You don’t get to put your insecurities on me. I told you I’d help you work through them, but you’re not makingmeyour out. Say you can’t love me. Say you don’t want me. Say the fucking words, Lana. You wouldn’t be the first.”
“I’m trying to protect you!”
“No. You’re making excuses because if you were actually trying to protect me, you’d let me in so we could do this together—fight him together.”
“You don’t know what he’s like. Hell, even I don’t know what he’s like,” she whispers, and I snort but it holds no humor.
“He’s a jealous guy, Lana, and now he’s an asshole. You think I’ve never met a guy like him? Lived with a guy like that and worse?”
She stares at me, her eyes filled with tears, but I can’t stop. I walk right up into her space as close as I can get without touching her.
“You won’t meet anyone as loyal as me, Lana. Everything I have is because I worked my ass off for it. The only person who has ever shown me unconditional love is Bodhi, and when I say I’d die for you and Holland and Beck, I mean that with every fiber of my being. If you can’t see that?—”
“That’s not what this is!”
“I’m not some fucking kid, Lana. I won’t beg for your attention.”
Tears stream down her face as adrenaline pumps through my veins, blackness creeping into the edges of my vision.
“I gotta get out of here. Call Nessa or Jensen—hell, just tellsomeonewhat’s going on. If you won’t let me keep you safe then someone else needs to know. Jensen’s gone but he’s still the sheriff.” I pause but don’t meet her gaze. “And lock the door behind me.”
I turn for the door, ripping it open as I stab the call button on my phone. I blink hard and will my breathing to slow, but I can’t stop this runaway train, and there’s only one person who can help me through it.
“What’s wrong?” Bodhi’s voice is steady. Serious. But I can’t answer. Lana calls my name from somewhere behind me, but it feels like I’m underwater, my body collapsing into the side of my truck as I try to keep myself upright. “Breathe.”
“I…”
“Don’t talk, just breathe.” He repeats it over and over as Lana drops to her knees in front of me, her eyes terrified as my vision goes in and out of focus. I’m scaring her. Fuck.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
I squeeze my eyelids shut and dig my nails into my palm, the pain like a jolt of electricity akin to jumping a dead battery.
I gasp and cough as air filters into my lungs. Bodhi curses on the other end of the phone as I slide down the side of the truck before landing with a grunt on the driveway.
“Where’s Lana?” Bodhi demands.
“She’s here,” I rasp.
“And she’s so fucking sorry,” she says, cupping my face and pressing kisses to my cheeks and forehead, my hand wrapping around her hip as I pull her into me, fitting her between my legs.
“Give her the phone,” Bodhi says and I do, letting my head drop to her shoulder as I hand my lifeline to the woman who still might be the love of my life.
27
LANA
Mason’s heart beats violently against my arm as he holds me against him, my own heart having plummeted to my feet no less than three times in the last thirty minutes. With shaking hands, I accept his phone and press it to my ear.
“Bodhi,” I say, not bothering to ask who it is because I know,and now I’m praying he doesn’t tell me to get the fuck away from Mason.
Hell of an impression I’m making.
“What the hell happened?”
“I—” I swallow hard and blink back the tears because despite how bad everything he said had hurt, Mason was right. He was right about everything. “I fucked up,” I admit as Mason’s arms tighten around me. “My ex showed up at my job and he knows about Mason and is threatening to file for full custody and it all just spiraled. I…I panicked, and Mason was right. God, he was right about everything.”
