Page 38 of Meant to be Falling

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“Don’t even think about finishing that sentence,” I say, the spark that had almost been extinguished growing brighter with each passing second. “You couldn’t give a good god damn about your children’s feelings, but you want to bitch at me over ahaton the counter. Besides, you’re hardly in a position to ask, let alone judge anyone I am or am not dating.”

“You better watch your fucking tone; you’re still my wife,” he seethes, and I roll my eyes even though he can’t see me. I wish he could; he’d be livid.

“Ex-wife.And, in case you forgot, you married the latest mistress.Youcheated onme,Jacob.Notthe other way around. And with multiple women, I might add.”

“Two is not multiple,” he snaps as I lean a hip against the counter. I’d confronted him about the affairs, but not like this. The wounds had been so fresh back then it was impossible to think past the hurt—of how much of my life I’d given to a man who didn’t love or respect me.

“Two that I know of, and honestly it could be a hundred and it doesn’t matter because we’re divorced and youmarriedone of those women. How is Sheila, by the way?”

The line goes dead, and I snort as I drop my phone on the granite surface. His indignation is completely out of line but so veryhim.

I don’t regret the conversation or the way I stood up for myself, but I’d poked at him too and that’s not like me. It was weird but alsofun.Still, a little reassurance wouldn’t hurt.

LANA: Jacob called to bitch about a hat left on my counter

AMARA: Because he’s threatened by the fact that you have a hot, younger boyfriend giving you LOTS of orgasms

LANA: He doesn’t even know who he is—just that a hat that didn’t belong to anyone the kids know was left on the counter

LANA: Also, Mason is not my boyfriend. We’re just having fun, figuring things out.

AMARA: Whatever you need to tell yourself

LANA: Seriously

AMARA: You’re not a casual hookup girl

LANA: I could be

AMARA: No you couldn’t

AMARA: And that’s okay, it’s incredible even, don’t make it be a negative

LANA: But he’s so young

AMARA: How many years again?

LANA: ELEVEN!

AMARA: There are only positives, his stamina being #1

LANA: But I’m scared

AMARA: You’re allowed to be that too

AMARA: But don’t let Jacob or anyone else have any say in what you do

LANA: The divorce still feels so fresh

AMARA: But is it? Really?

LANA: No

AMARA: (gif of woman shrugging)

AMARA: I think you need to let yourself be happy and DATE him—actually date him.

LANA: And what if it doesn’t work out?