Page 85 of Accidentally Falling
“I’m happy for you.”
“I need to apologize, Arden,” my mother says. “I handled everything wrong, right from the start. I clouded your future with my past and I’m so sorry. You didn’t deserve it, any of it.”
“I didn’t and neither did Jude,” I tell her even though I’m still angry with him. “He’s worked so hard to fill every void in my life—the holes you both left. It wasn’t fair to him but not once has he complained.”
“We never wanted to hurt you with our relationship,” my father says quietly as guilt settles into my gut.
“You should be allowed to date whoever you want, and if that’s each other then that’s great. I got caught up in the potential fallout of having to choose one of you over the other, and I just can’t do that. I don’twantto do it.”
“I hate how much I hurt you and all the things I’ve missed,”—Mom’s voice wavers—“but you’ve done so beautifully and I’m proud of you.”
“Thank you.”
“I hope that when you’re ready, you’ll be willing to share this with me and I can get to know you and Jude and the baby.” She looks at my father. “Thatwecan get to know all of you.”
“I’d like that,”—I pause, trying to find the words—“but I need this to go slow. You’ve both infused so much doubt into my psyche, and it’s been daunting trying to unravel it. Speaking of daunting, I’m exhausted and I think I need to go lie down for a while.”
My mother’s lip quivers as I slide out of the booth. “Am I allowed to say you can call me if you need anything?”
“Sure.” Rubbing the spot between my eyebrows, I release a weary exhale. “We’ll be okay.”
And we will. I just can’t handle any more of that today.
Excusing myself, I walk back over toward where Jude is standing and brace myself for what’s next.
JUDE
I watchedas Arden talked with her parents, her body language guarded but still open as they sat there. I know today isn’t goingto fix everything, but it’s definitely a start and hopefully a good one.
“How’d it go?” I ask when she approaches.
“You hadno rightto do that to me—blindside me like that.”
“You needed the push and things worked out. That’s supposed to be a good thing.”
“It can be a good thing and I can still be pissed,” she practically yells. “You set this up—setmeup—and I hate it. I hate that I’m mad but I can’t just brush it off because you didn’t trust me with this. You said we were a team and that we’d figure this out together.”
“I did this for you?—”
“Yup.” She pops thepand blinks back tears. “You sure did.”
“Arden.”
“No. Work your shift. I need some time. Alone.”
Fuck.
48
ARDEN
Walking out of the bar was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but I had to. I couldn’t stay and let these feelings turn into something toxic.
Something I can’t take back.
Because while Iknowhe meant well, it still hurts that he did that to me right out in the open. Hell, I’d be less upset if he had just invited them here for that little intervention.
Maybe next time.
