Page 35 of Enough
My head lowers as I ask, “You’d really stay with me?”
She smiles and grabs my hand, squeezing it gently. “I’d really.”
“What about Wookie?”
My dad said he’d watch him while my mom visits my cousin Kallie and her husband Adam in Atlanta. It’s all good!”
I pause for a moment as I stare down at my tissue-filled hands. “What am I going to do, Gwen?”
She rests on the corner of the bed and hesitates as she considers what to say. “You’re going to take it one day at atime, and I’m going to help you. You’re gonna get through this. I promise you. Someday, it’s all going to be okay.”
I desperately want to believe her, but right now, all I feel is empty. The life I thought I had ended along with the life I thought I was going to have. I don’t know where to go from here. I don’t know where to start.
I OPEN THE garage door so quietly no one hears me, not even Roscoe. As I step unnoticed into the room, I see Grandma Kay helping Kale with his math and Marlow stirring meat sauce on the stove. I asked Gwen to give me an hour to talk to them, so she ran to the grocery store for me. If I had any doubts about her love for me, she confirmed it when she volunteered to step inside Walton’s to pick up my prescription and grab a few groceries. Marlow turns from the stove and is the first to notice me.
“Mommy!” I’m surprised by how much my heart aches at the word. Marlow jumps into my arms, and I bend down to put my face in her hair. She smells like home.
Kale hugs me as well but more gently. I wonder what they know.
“Can you two come and sit with me for a minute?” I ask.
They follow me into the family room, and I slowly lower myself down on the couch. They sit nervously on the coffee table in front of me.
“Did Grandma Kay tell you I was in the hospital?”
“Yes,” Marlow responds, “but she said you’d tell us why when you got home.”
“Are you dying?” Kale asks with dread.
“No, Kale! I’m not dying. Why would you think that?”
“My friend Scott’s mom got sick and went to the hospital. He said she never came home. He said she had cancer.”
“That’s terrible, but no. I don’t have cancer. I’m not going anywhere, okay?” I cup his chin in my hand.
“Then what’s up, Mom?” Marlow asks.
My eyes flutter between them. I wonder if they’re old enough to understand. I wonder if it’s too much to put on their shoulders.”
“Just tell us, Mom,” Marlow says. “We can handle it. We’re tougher than most kids.”
“Yeah,” Kale interjects. He points toward Marlow. “She fell down yesterday while we were playing kickball and skinned her knee real bad. She didn’t even flinch. She got up and kept on playing. Most girls would have cried, but not Marlow. She’s tough!”
I immediately check her knees. The left one is covered with a bandage. Marlow beams proudly at Kale’s words, and I can feel my pride and love for them grow in my chest.
“Are you really okay?” I ask her skeptically.
“Mom, weren’t you listening? I’m totes fine!”
I laugh to myself. These kids are the best medicine in the world. I take a deep breath and glance over to Kay. She nods her head to me, giving me the approval and the confidence I need.
“Youaretough, and I’m so proud of you. You know that, right?”
They nod. I hold their small hands in mine and take a steadying breath. “Have you ever gotten good news and bad news in the same day?”
Marlow shrugs and Kale turns his head to think. “Yeah,” he says. “Like when I have no homework and then I find out you’re making broccoli for dinner.”
I laugh lightly, and Marlow’s expression changes with understanding.
