Page 70 of Enough
“Do you?” she asks again.
I face her, and my lips begin to tremble. “I never felt like I was enough back then. Not enough for Nick and not enough for Mike. I wasn’t enough of a daughter, and I should have gone to dinner that night when Mom and Dad asked me to. Maybe they wouldn’t have died.”
“Oh, child!” Grandma Kay wraps me in her arms. “That accident had nothing to do with you not being with them and everything to do with the slick roads.”
I slam my eyes shut as I utter the words I’ve only said to myself. “If I would have been with them, maybe I would have told Dad to slow down and he wouldn’t have lost control of the car.”
“Or maybe you would have died too. Where would that have left me? I’m telling you, everything happens for a reason. Things happen in life to teach you a lesson. There is something to be learned from every sorrow and every pain. Now I fully believe there is a reason you married Mike, and it’s more than just to put those two little beacons of light upstairs into the world.”
She leans on the table and slides into the chair. “Sometimes the pain makes the joy that much sweeter. Don’t you see? There’s a reason that young man walked back into your life. You just need to figure out what that reason is. Open your heart, Ev. Believe in yourself. Allow yourself to be happy. You are enough!”
“I do believe in myself. I know I’m enough.” As I say itout loud, I almost convince myself it’s true.
“Prove it! See ifhedeservesyou.”
I squat down in front of her, and she places her hands on either side of my face. “You are a gift. The right man will know that and treat you like the treasure you are. Allow yourself to be treasured.”
“I will. Even if Nick’s not the one.” I laugh.
“Hmmm.” She shrugs. “I’d bet my can of red paint it’s always been him.”
AT TWO O’CLOCK I hear my phone vibrating on the washing machine. I set it down earlier and forgot all about it as I spent my nervous energy cleaning house. I notice there are six missed calls from Gwen. I call her back.
“Where have you been?” Gwen shouts as she answers.
“I was cleaning. I had it on vibrate and didn’t hear you calling. What’s going on?”
“Guess who showed up at the track today.”
My insides clap in excitement and then pause, awaiting a possible pissed off friend. “Who?” I feign uncertainty.
“Cooper!”
“What?” I shout. I’m quite proud of myself for acting surprised.
“Twice in one day. What are the chances?”
I don’t know if she’s asking me seriously, and I pause uncertainly for a moment. She continues and I think I’m off the hook.
“Today at practice he asked me to go out tonight, but Itold him I had plans.”
I pace back and forth. I take a load of towels out of the dryer and fold them nervously.
“Then at noon, I was running the trail like I always do and I could sense another runner approaching fast. As soon as they got close, they slowed down behind me. It’s annoying as fuck when that happens. I could feel my blood boiling. I was about to turn around and tell them to just fucking pass me if I wasn’t going fast enough. Instead I just decided to stop dead in my tracks. He almost fell over me.”
“Oh my God!” I laugh. Cooper has no game.
“He had to avoid hitting me, and just as I was about to turn and yell at whoever was riding my ass, I saw it was him. I said, ‘God dammit, Cooper. What the hell?’ He stumbled to the ground and then started to laugh. It’s more like a rumble. His voice is so deep.”
“Then what happened?” I ask, praying she didn’t read him the riot act.
“I held out my hand to him to help him up. He was wearing a tight running shirt and shorts. It’s pretty obvious he lifts weights.”
I smile to myself. I can’t help but anticipate something good between them.
“I asked him what he was doing there, and he said one of his buddies recommended he try running the trails. He said he thought it might be a nice change of pace. I mean it’s crazy. What are the chances he would be there the same time as me on the same day I saw him at the soccer game?”
I pause for a moment to consider her tone. It’s not accusatory. It sounds like legitimate surprise. I wonder if she knows I told him. Maybe she does but she’s not mad. I’m notgoing to admit to anything, so I simply say, “Sounds like fate!”
