Page 80 of Enough
“Did I complain?” I ask as I reach for his arm.
He steps forward and against me and I lean into him. “No… no, you didn’t. But this is exactly how I lost you the last time, and I don’t want to lose you again.”
“You don’t want to lose me?” I question. My heart floods with fear and hope.
He shakes his head and kisses the tip of my nose. “You were never just sex to me. I adored you, and now that we’re together again, I remember why.”
I smile up at him and think that maybe I should admit that I don’t want to lose him either, but there’s a knock on the door. He pulls his wallet from his pocket and pays the delivery guy. He returns with a two-liter of Diet Coke and a very large pizza.
“We can sit at the bar?” he asks as he motions toward it.
“Or the floor. I’m good with the floor.”
He smiles and brings the pizza over to the couch. He heads over to the kitchen and returns with paper plates, a rollof paper towels, and two glasses filled with ice.
I scoot down and rest on my heels, opening the pizza box. The smell makes me groan, and I bring a piece to my lips before he’s able to hand me a plate. He laughs. “Youwerehungry.”
“This,” I say, motioning to the pizza, “is me.”
He smiles briefly then frowns again.
“I’m sorry I ruined your dinner plans,” I tell him.
“I’m sorry I tried to act like I have my shit together.”
“You do.”
“I really don’t,” he states as he crosses his legs and lifts a piece of pizza to his plate. I reach for a paper towel and he helps me.
“It was a beautiful place. I just didn’t feel like I belonged there.”
He shakes his head. “You belong in the best of everything.”
“Why do you say that stuff?” I ask as I take another large bite of pizza.
“I only took you there because I wanted you to feel as special as you are. You’re beautiful, Ever. You always have been. Inside and out.”
I suddenly feel conscious of my lumpy body, and I lift my plate and head over to the bar.
He follows me and sighs. “What did I say now?”
“It’s not you. You’re sweet and kind and treat me better than I deserve. I’m just not the same girl you think you remember.”
“You seem the same to me.”
I drop my plate on the bar and turn to face him. “I’ve had two kids, Nick. Underneath this dress are stretch marks and ascar from two cesareans. I have way too tight underwear on to hold everything in and enough cellulite to rival the waves in the ocean.”
He twists his head to the side and wipes his mouth with a paper towel as he finishes chewing his last bite. He places his plate on the counter and takes my hands. He positions them on his waist and angles me close to him. My breath hitches, and I stare into him with uncertainty.
“You are beautiful. I don’t care about all that shit. Don’t you understand? When I look at you, I see you. The girl who took my heart at the age of twenty-one and never returned it. I. See. You. You’ll always be you. That’s all I care about.”
I swallow hard at his proximity and then roll my eyes. He laughs and takes a step back to get a better view of my face. “Why are you rolling your eyes at me?”
“Because you’re full of shit.” I turn away from him and lift my slice of pizza from my plate. “If you saw me naked, you wouldn’t be whistling the same tune.” I laugh.
His eyes darken. “WhenI see you naked, I won’t be whistling anything. I’ll be licking every inch of you.”
My pizza slides out of my hand and falls cheese-first onto the floor.
