Page 73 of Badd Ass
I took my glass, eyeing my older brother. “So.”
“You love her?”
I slammed back the shot and then tossed the shot glass into the sink. “Yes.”
“You’re sure?” He crossed his arms over his chest and glared hard at me. “Don’t hook into this because you think you have to. You can take care of your responsibility to her and the kid without trying to make something work neither of you are sure about.”
I nodded. “I’m sure. I mean, I have no clue what the fuck I’m gonna do, but I’m sure I love her. It’s not just about the kid. I haven’t even really processed that as a reality yet. Right now, I’m just trying to figure out how to be in a relationship.”
A trio of young girls angled up to the bar and Sebastian leaned forward on his forearms, shooting them his trademark sexy bartender grin. They tittered and bent over to offer him a look down their low-cut blouses, but he didn’t even glance that way. Getting the message, they ordered chocolate martinis and left a nice cash tip when he handed them their drinks.
He wiped the stupid grin off his face, stuffing the tip into the jar. “It’s complicated, being in a relationship. But it’s also a lot easier than you’d think.”
I eyed him. “That makesnosense.”
He shrugged. “It does, though. You gotta be thinking about her all the time. It takes some adjustment. Like, you wanna go somewhere, go hit up a bar for drinks, or take a ride, or sleep in, or hit up downtown for breakfast, you gotta think about her. Everything you do affects her. It’s not just you anymore. She’ll want you to do shit you won’t want to do, tell you what to wear, nag about the fuckin’ toilet seat, all that bullshit, and it’s all exactly that, just bullshit. Being around someone all day, every day, putting her first, in everything…that’s the part that’s harder.”
I snickered. “Been married two months and suddenly you’re a relationship expert?”
“We’ve been living together for six months, so I’m farther ahead than you, asshole.”
I acceded his point with a shrug and a nod. “I guess you’re right. You make it sound like it’s…easy, though. Like, what the fuck have I been afraid of all this time?”
He bobbed his head side to side. “I was as committed to casual, no-strings sex same as you, if not more. That shit was mylife, Zane. But then Dru appeared and everything just…changed. It’s not like suddenly I understood relationships or had this come to Jesus moment about the sanctity of sex or some shit. The change wasDru. I can’t fathom being in a relationship with anyone else. I didn’t want one in the first place, but I couldn’tnotbe with her. It was just this…it’s aneed, man. Remember when I said the only way you’ll know is if youknow? Well, if what I just said makes any sense to you at all, then youknow.” He hissed in frustration. “Shit, I don’t know how to put it any better than that.”
“No, dude, that makes perfect sense, now.”
He grinned at me. “But once you’re in it for a while, there is this moment like holy shit, what was I so scared about? This relationship shit ain’t so bad after all.”
“How so?”
“I grew up taking care of you guys and myself, right? So I can cook, I can clean, I can do laundry, all that shit. I did it for all of you guysandDad after Mom died, and I kept doing it until Xavier left for Stanford, and I kept doing it for myself. So, I’m not this asshole gorilla who thinks women belong in the kitchen. But having a woman around all the time? It’s amazing. I mean, the shit she thinks of, it’s just all this stuff I’d have never even considered.”
“Like the way she organized the kitchen?” I said, thinking about how much more neat and organized and sensible the kitchen was, now that Dru lived with us.
“Or the laundry? I mean you and Xavier do your own, but she folds my things different, and I don’t even know how or why, but the clothes are just…softer, and smell better.”
I laughed. “That’s called better detergent and fabric softener, doofus.”
He rolled his eyes. “You know what I’m talking about, fucker.”
“I’ve gotta admit, I love the food she buys. Like, I’d have never even thought about it, but she stocks all this food for actual meals, not just, like, fuckin’ burgers and cold cuts and mac ’n cheese and shit. Like, we can make fuckin’ chili and pasta and baked chicken and shit.”
“That’s what I’m saying! She just makes things better, and she’s not even trying. It’s just how she does life.” He nudged me. “And getting to go to bed at night with her? And waking up next to her every morning? I’m not even talking about sex, I just mean going to bed and waking up with her. I wake up happier every single morning just because she’s there, because I get to have my arms around her all night.”
I nodded. “A few months ago I would have ripped you to pieces for that mushy bullshit, but now?” I tapped the bar, thinking of the nights I’d spent with Mara. “I get it, now.”
“There’s nothing like it, is there?”
I shook my head. “There really isn’t.”
The women came back at that moment, all three with their arms linked together, cackling like a pack of hyenas. Brock, who was on the floor tonight, stood at the service bar, staring at the women just like Bast and I were.
“That’s a hell of a sight, ain’t it boys?” he asked.
Bast and I glanced at him.
“You got that right, brother,” I said, and then laughed as a thought hit me. “You know, guys, if things keep going like this, we’re gonna have to think about expanding our living situation. There ain’t no way eight couples are all gonna fit into two little apartments.”
