Page 89 of Old Fashioned
I heard the screen door open behind me, and I looked up, meeting Mom’s worried gaze. I didn’t have to say anything for her to understand, and she made her way down the steps to join us.
“Hey, sweetie,” she said to Paige, running her fingers through Paige’s wild curls before she reached out her hand. Paige looked at it, and then up at Mom. “Why don’t you come inside with me. We just cut some cake, and I saw anespeciallybig slice with your name on it.
Paige sniffed, rubbing her nose with the back of her sleeve before she looked up at me. I nodded, encouraging her with a confident smile, and she took Mom’s hand, who gave Sydney a soft nod of acknowledgement and me a sympathetic smile before she led Paige inside.
I watched them walk all the way inside, and as soon as Mom shut the wooden door inside the screen one and gave us privacy, I turned back to Sydney.
The sight of her made my knees buckle.
Her hair was tied into a messy nest on top of her head, and her eyes were swollen, bloodshot, the stains of tears still marring her cheeks. She looked so small and meek, so sad and defeated, and her eyes welled with more tears the longer we stood there — which just broke me even more.
“I’m so sorry,” she whispered as the first tear slipped from her left eye and down her cheek. Another one followed it as her face crumpled. “To just show up here, after everything… I’m so sorry.”
I shook my head, crossing the distance between us and pulling her into me without another word. She choked on a sob once she was in my arms, and every cell in my body stood at attention, like I’d have to fight to defend her at any moment.
“Don’t apologize,” I told her, holding her so tight in my arms I worried I’d crush her. My lips were right by her ear, and I resisted the urge to kiss the skin beneath it. Instead, I cradled the back of her head and wrapped my other arm full around her, holding her to my chest. “You never have to apologize for coming to me. I will always be here.”
“But, I was so awful to you last weekend,” she cried into my shirt, and her shoulders shook violently before she could speak again. “I was wrong, Jordan. You were right. Iwasa coward.”
“Shhh,” I tried to tell her, but she shook her head, pulling back from my embrace to swipe the tears from her face and look me in the eyes.
“I was,” she instead again. “It was all just so overwhelming, so sudden, and the last thing I expected. I thought when we went on that walk…” Another wave of emotion flashed on her face, but she rolled her lips together, fighting against it before she whispered, “I wanted to steal you away to tell you that I loved you.”
My shoulders deflated, but my heart swelled with hope.
“And then you told me what you found, and then we were talking about lawyers and testimonies and…” She shook her head again. “It just got so big and realsofast and I didn’t know what to do and I ran,” she confessed on a breath. “And I’m so sorry. But Ido, Jordan. I do love you. And I’m not running anymore. I want to fight. Ineedto fight. With you, with your family, withmyfamily. I’m done with this town and its corrupt powers. And I won’t let you fight them without me.”
I pulled her into me again, this time not fighting it when my heart urged me to kiss her hair. I held my lips there, closing my eyes and breathing her in.
“Sydney, I understand now,” I told her. “Randy… he was waiting for me when I left the field last night. He threatened me, threatenedyou, and Paige. I understand now why you were scared.” I swallowed. “It scaredme, too. He has a lot of power, there’s no denying that. And I don’t want you to put you and your daughter in jeopardy just to—”
“No,” she said loudly, pressing her hands into my chest and looking up at me. “He doesnothave power — not over me, or over Paige — not anymore. I decided that, and I will do whatever it takes to ensure it’s true.”
I searched her eyes, riddled with pain and terror, as I swept her hair back from her face. “What happened?”
Her bottom lip trembled. “He came to the house today, drunk or hungover or both. And angry. He wassoangry,” she whispered, shaking her head. “And he threatened me, said he would convince child services that I was an unfit mother, doing drugs and bringing random men home.”
My jaw clenched. “That’s fucking bullshit.”
“I know, andheknows that, too — but as he liked to remind me today,he is the cops,” she said, mimicking his voice. “And he has every powerful man in this town wrapped around his finger, waiting to do what he asks — whether to pay back a debt or to keep theirowndirty laundry from being exposed.”
“That motherfucker…”
“And he grabbed me,” she continued on a sob, showing me her arm that was already bruising. “And said I could make it all go away if I gave him another chance, and then Paige saw us, and she was crying and screaming at him to let me go but he wouldn’t.” She closed her eyes, crying, shaking her head like she couldn’t believe the story she was telling me was real. “And then she was pulling at me, and shebit him, Jordan.” Her eyes met mine. “She bit him, and I pushed him out, and then he was still going on from the other side of the door.” She sniffed, scowling. “He said heownsme. And I decided right then and there that this all has to end. I don’t know how, but I know I would rather die trying than to give in to his bullshit even one more day.”
My chest was on fire with rage, and it was nearly impossible to cool it down, to remain calm after hearing her story. I forced a long, slow exhale, closing my eyes for a while before I opened them and found her staring back at me again.
“I’m supposed to trade off with him on Tuesday,” she said softly. “I can’t… Iwon’thand my daughter back to that monster.”
I nodded, pulling her into me once more and hugging her tight. When she looked up at me again, our lips were just inches apart, our breaths warm where they met between us.
“I’m in love with you, too, Sydney,” I whispered, and with the words, more tears glossed her brown eyes. “Do you know that? I love you with everything that I am, and I give you my word that he willneverhurt you or Paige again. Ever. You hear me?”
She nodded, and when she pressed onto her toes to kiss me, I tasted her salty tears on those sweet lips.
We held each other tight, kissing like the world was ending and this was our final moment together. Itfeltthat way — like we were on the precipice of the biggest storm, one we weren’t sure we would live through.
“We have to take him down,” she said, definitively. “Him, and Patrick, and whoever else is responsible for your father’s death. We have to get justice, Jordan. We must.”
