Page 66 of Foresyth Conservatory
“I know you won’t disappoint us.”
*
When Circle broke, I felt so exhausted I could have slept for a week straight. Perhaps the Book had siphoned my energy.No, I broke the train of thought. I was tired because I had been through an exhausting ordeal of pretending to say all the right things and not revealing my true feelings. Lying was tiresome.
I stepped out of the sitting room and started down the hall. It pleasantly surprised me that dusk had not fallen yet, despite it being after Circle. I hesitated by the window in the dining room, watching the pinks and purples in the clouds intertwine behind the blossoming trees.
“Beautiful sunset,” Aspen said, coming up behind me. His eyes were fixated on me, despite remarking at the view. I instinctively jerked back.
“So, I guess you’re not keen on knives,” he said, raising both his hands up. “I’m unarmed, I promise,” he added, raising his hands in defense. “And besides, it wouldn’t be hard to pin you to the wall, knife or no.” His smile beamed, showing his teeth in a way that made my heart skip. A low laugh rumbled from his chest. “Relax, Dahlia. Only joking.”
“Why are you always following me?” I asked, heat rising to my face.
“Not much else to do in this old, boring House. And you’re pretty interesting.” He shrugged his shoulders in a way that made me believe him. “I think Koi would agree.”
I narrowed my eyes at the insinuation. “Your idea of alleviating your boredom is to threaten me?” I asked.
He paused, considering. He traced a finger across his bottom lip in thought and my eyes followed. The motion was aggravating. Was he using the cards on me right now? I wanted to blame them for the curling knot of heat in my stomach.
“Well, no. Not quite. I came here to apologize,” he said, moving closer. I took a step back, and he lifted his hands again. “I’m just trying to keep my voice low,” he said, his eyes glancing at the open door of the dining room. We were only a few feet away from the hall. He stepped closer and this time I didn’t move.
“What part? Kidnapping me, or threatening to slice my throat?” I shot back, but the harshness of the intended words was lost in the quiver at my throat. Tears threatened at the corner of my eyes, but I didn’t let them fall.Shit, I was losing it.
Aspen’s features softened, and he stepped closer to the window. “For all of it. Koi was right. We should have let you in much earlier. Prepared you better.”
“If it hadn’t been for the vow of silence toward non-Initiatives,” I mocked. “I never took you as a rule follower,” I said.
“I’m not,” he said. “and telling you too much, too soon—well, you’re hard to convince of anything you can’t rationalize.”
“Everyone should be.”
His brows furrowed. “Just because you can’t rationalize something doesn’t mean it isn’t real.”
“Itisn’treal to me.” He was so close to me I could smell the musk from his skin, clover and pine, and something earthy like beeswax. For a moment I forgot what we were talking about.
“What isn’t real?” He teased, sensing my confusion.
“I saw it on you,” I said, my mind flashing to when he held me against his chest, knife in hand. That smile, oozing satisfaction. It was unmistakable. I might be good at reading books, but I was damn prodigious at reading people. “You looked so satisfied, holding that athame to my neck,” I said, my voice light. I meant it to be accusatory, but it had come out as if I was remembering a dream.
A corner of his mouth lifted. “I can’t deny that I like being close to you, no matter the circumstances.” His mouth was so close to my neck, I could feel the breath on the same spot where he had held the dagger just a few days before. His hand jerked upward, as if to brush my hair, but then fell to his side.
Snap out of it,a distant voice screamed in my mind.He’s using the cards on you.Even though the thought was ludicrous, it broke me out of whatever trance I had found myself in.
He sensed my shift and took a step back.
“You’re using the cards,” I said, my eyes narrowing like darts. “To get close to me. Funny for someone who’s such a shameless flirt, you need to rely on magick to get close to people.” I was satisfied by how harshly the words had come out. Hurt flashed across his features, and I knew my words had hit their mark.
“That’s not true.” His jaw tightened. “I have never used the cards on you.”
I searched him for a tell but couldn’t come up with one. Though that didn’t mean much given he was a prodigious liar.
“Admit it. You’re manipulating me.” I pressed harder, wanting him to give in. I might not be reading his cards, but I could still read his features.
He laughed but the sound came out hollow. “That’s rich. Coming from the master manipulator. I’ve heard how youreadfor people. How you read for Koi,” he said. The words stung because they were true.
“That’s—” The words stopped coming out. I couldn’t even deny it. The lies exhausted me.
“I’m not even blaming you for it,” he said, running his hands through his hair. “I just— damn, I just want somethingtrue. And you’re the closest thing I’ve ever seen to the truth. And what’s so funny is that you don’t even know,” he said. “You try to hide your feelings, you try to manipulate us, but the truth is written all over that precious face of yours. You’re the truest thing I’ve ever seen.”
