Page 35 of Unmasking Secrets
“Not as often as I would like.” Tabitha laughs before pulling away and going to greet my mom.
“Half the nonsense you write in yours is like another language.” I tease and follow behind her. “College this and sorority that. I know more about some Kappa something another Sigma person than I should ever know about.”
“You’re my best friend and I have to tell someone about the crazy things these people get into. The houses are ridiculous there.” Tabitha shakes her head.
“Dinner,” Mom announces.
“This looks amazing, Gracie.” Marcus enters the dining room, followed by my dad.
The six of us take our seats, the same as we always have when we’re together. The dads at the ends of the tables. The moms to one side. The kids to the other.
I look down to see Tabitha grab my hand and give it a squeeze. We’ve been friends for as long as I can remember.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” she whispers before releasing my hand.
Fuck, I missed my girl.
I know it’s going to be hard to wait until I’m done with the academy. But in two years, we’ll both graduate. I’ll officially be an officer and she can use her library science degree or be a stay at home mom, when we get to that point. Whatever she wants to do, I will support her. I can’t tell her yet. She deserves the world and I’m going to be the one to give it to her. She just doesn’t know it.
Not yet.
CHAPTER TWENTY
TABITHA
Istumble in the dark on my way to the bathroom, flip the light on, and nearly scream. My hand covers my mouth as I lean closer to the mirror. I hardly recognize myself. My hair looks like an animal turned it into a nest. How long has it been since I paid attention? A gurgling noise comes from my stomach. When did I last eat?
Days?
My toothbrush stares back at me. I shake my head and quickly grab it and the toothpaste. Once I’m done brushing my teeth, I turn the shower on and let the water warm up.
I stare at my reflection again.Look at the mess you are, Tabitha.What have people thought? Have I seen anyone besides Archie over the last couple of days? I don’t remember leaving the room.
I shake my head as I strip out of my pajamas. Stepping into the water makes me feel alive. It’s too hot, but I let it sting for a moment before adjusting the water to a more comfortable temperature. I stand under the sprayer for a while, zoning in and out as I reflect on the last few days—or week.
After a long time of standing under the water, I reach for the washcloth and soap and lather my body before tackling the mess my hair has become. Taking extra care to let the conditioner sink in.
I know realistically that I’m allowed to have off days. A lot has happened lately that only pushed me farther into the dark. I didn’t know if I was ever going to crawl out of it. Part of me clung to those moments in the evening when Archie held me and I opened up. I needed him, but I didn’t want to need him.
Once I am dressed and looking somewhat human again, I grab a bottle of water from the mini-fridge and chug it before digging through my travel bag for a snack. I find a protein bar partially squished at the bottom—it will do. I just need a little something in my stomach before I head downstairs and am around the others.
My phone stares back at me, and I know it’s time to return to the real world. I power it on and take my time responding to messages. I assure Max I am okay and promise my agent I will video call with her next week, but to email me the details of the company she wants me to work with next so I can prepare.
One step at a time.
Silence greeted me downstairs. It’s eerie.
“Hey.” Archie closes his laptop and stands. “Are you hungry? There’s some leftover lasagna from last night.”
I nod and follow him to the kitchen.
“Want to talk about it?” He speaks softly as he pulls out a plate for me.
I take in a deep breath and exhale slowly. “I got overwhelmed.”
“Makes sense.” He scoops some of the leftovers onto a plate, places it in the microwave, and then moves the dish back to the fridge.
“I get in these moods sometimes. It’s difficult to explain. It’s like I’m sinking and stuck. I used to take medication for it, but Ry—.” I stop. “I should probably see a professional.” I close my eyes.
