Page 49 of Sin Bins and Second Chances
“I want everything with you, Daisy.”
I stop and face him. “I feel like I was tricked. Is it possible to be orgasm-drunk? Is that a thing?” I rub at my temples.
“You don’t want this?” He throws the covers back and moves fast to stand in front of me.
“I didn’t say that,” I argue.
“Then talk to me.” His hands move to pull me closer, but I take a step back. “Fuck.” His hand raises, and he runs it through his dark hair.
“Honesty, right? Then you need to talk to me too.” How did we get to this moment?
“I’ve been trying to do that since the moment I saw you in your cousin’s kitchen.” His voice raises, and he takes a step towards me.
No. “I want you to leave.” I cross my arms.
Ethan laughs and a smile crosses his face. It looks slightly deranged. “No, you don’t.”
“Don’t tell me what I want.” I take a step back. “Get out!”
“No.” He stalks forward, his eyes never leaving mine.
“Leave.” Does he not understand the word coming out of me? “Honesty, right? Then leave! Go away!” I feel my voice break, but I refuse to show those emotions. How does he do this? He needs to leave. I want to go back to the numbness. At least I thought I was happy before.
Ethan prowls toward me, as though he knows what I’m fighting against. I’m not ready to admit it to myself, let alone out loud. I continue to back up until my back hits the wall. He closes the distance between us.
“I’m not going anywhere.” He cages me in.
My heart races. Not only with desire, but with the paralyzing fear for all the things that could go wrong.
“I can’t do this,” I admit, and look away.
His hand moves to my shoulder,brushing softly up my neck until I’m forced to look at him. His grip on me is firm, yet gentle.
“I can’t.” My eyes focus on his as he holds me still.
His eyes soften, but his hand doesn’t. “Honesty, remember?”
I swallow against his grip. “We’re in this together. It takes two people to make a baby, and neither one of us were worried about protection. You want to be with me so much you’d rather find a way for me to be stuck with you. That idea scares you because it’s just one more way I can break your heart. Trust me when I say that is the last fucking thing I will ever do.” His nostrils flare. “I’m not going anywhere and you will not push me away again. Never.”
“No,” the lie slips from my lips like a cry.
“Yeah, baby.”
“I can’t.” My eyes close as tears threaten to leak out.
“I love you, Daisy. I’m never giving you up.” His lips press to mine. He pulls back. “Tell me you don’t want me. Tell me you don’t want this. Otherwise, we’re making a baby or we keep practicing for that day.” I shake my head. “Yeah, baby. I’mgoing to marry you.” I continue to shake my head. “I’m going to tie you to me in every fucking way possible until you can’t leave without dragging me with you.”
“Why?”
“Because I fucking love you. You’re my everything.” His eyes burn into mine. “I couldn’t walk away from you if I wanted to. You think you can push me away, but you’re my fucking oxygen. So no, Daisy, you don’t get to try and push me away or get me to leave. We’re twin flames from the same wick.” His forehead rests on mine.
My chest tightens with panic. He’s holding me still and I’m unable to do anything but cry. Every part of me wants to believe him and scream yes to all of it. I want to jump first.
“I never believed in fate or destiny. Daisy, it was all bullshit for fantasy stories, make believe. But you—you make it un-fucking-deniable. Every cell in my body knows it.” I can feel the tremor in his breath. His face is close to mine. “This isn’t just love. Our hearts have always known. This isn’t like before. We were too young to understand. Maybe that’s why it was so easy for you to pushme away before, to end things. I know you feel it now, the pull. This is soul-deep.”
I feel like I’ve been pulled into one of the stories I watch or read about. A love like this—it doesn’t seem real. It feels like a dream. His eyes pierce mine, keeping me hostage. He’s right about everything. It feels suffocating to admit it. I take a shaky breath.
“I need you to never let me go. I’m going to be a pain in the ass and fight you, but I need you to not let me.”
