Page 76 of Rescued By the Beast
Sandra
The computer turns on, and the screen illuminates my face as I lean over the keyboard. I don't sit down in the chair because I'm naked; I still need to go out and get the clothes I had to leave in the bushes.
I take a deep breath, trying to focus on what really matters now: Lucy's email. She must have replied by now.
I open my inbox and see that I'm right. My heart races, and a pang of guilt hits me as I read her words.
Sandra, I was freaking out and about to buy a ticket to Salem, I was going on my next day off. If you hadn't sent me that email, I would have gone there and searched the whole city looking for you, because you still haven't confirmed your apartment address.
Are you really okay? I'm still worried, you know?
I love you, my friend.
The weight of Lucy's words affects me more than I'd like to admit. She really cares, and I... I left her in doubt, in uncertainty. I didn't want to do that. I didn't want to worry her, I didn't want to involve anyone in this chaos.
I feel a lump in my throat as I reply quickly, my mind still spinning around it.
I'm sorry for everything, Lucy. You don't need to worry. I'm fine. I'll sort things out here, and when everything calms down, we can talk properly. I hope you didn't spend any money on this. You've always been so good to me. I'm really sorry. Don't worry.
I love you too, very much!
I close the email window and, for a moment, I stand there, motionless. The sound of the empty house is strange. Mark is at work, and I, on the other hand, find myself lost in a routine I did not choose.
But there's nothing to think about, I need to go get my clothes and pick up the spare key I hid under the rock.
I look at the kitchen door. It's closed, but not locked. Mark didn't lock it, and for a moment, I wonder if he simply forgot or if, somehow, he trusts that the cat won't go too far. Or maybe... maybe he knows that when I'm in danger, I'm always somehow connected to him. Mark will always come to save me.
I walk to the back door and turn the handle, leaving it ajar once again. Fresh air rushes in through the opening, and a feeling of freedom washes over me for a moment.
I force my transformation and become a cat again, easily jumping over the wall before running to the bushes where I left my clothes. There is no one around, the environment silent, as if the stars are granting me the privacy I need. Even in the soft morning light, as the sky brightens, I know they are there, ethereal and silent, watching me from afar.
Without hesitation, I transform again, feeling the transition quick and full of necessity. I hurriedly put my clotheson, adjusting the fabric as I pat the dress to remove the leaves and dirt that have stuck to it.
I feel my essence more intensely, greater than in previous days, despite the transformations that drained it today. The crack in the barrier that blocks it seems to have widened, still existing, but weaker, as if each time I force the transformation, the space where the essence flows expands a little more, releasing a growing energy, still contained, but more present.
I return to the cabin, this time when I reach the gate I type in the access code and enter in my human form. I search for the stone where I kept the key and lift it, taking the object in my hand and bringing it back to the key ring.
I take a deep breath and exhale with a sigh.
Now that the task is complete, I feel lost, as if I have forgotten how to behave as a human. There is a disconnect, a strange feeling of no longer knowing how to act.
I decide to brush my teeth and take a long hot bath, trying to reconnect with myself. I think about going up to my room, using the en suite bathroom, but something stops me. My cheeks flush as I remember last night, and an unexpected shyness takes hold of me, as if it were somehow wrong.
Which is funny, because yesterday I had no problem watching Mark masturbate.
Something inside me breaks free when I'm in cat form, as if the rules no longer exist, as if I can hide, lose myself, do whatever I want without anyone judging me. As an animal, I am free, unbound by morality or repression. But as a woman, I still carry the shadow of that trauma, the remnants of what that cheating bastard did to me, as if it were impossible to forget the limitations imposed on me, the judgements that still haunt me.
I can't believe I almost lost my virginity to him...
A shiver runs down my spine, and I grimace in disgust. I hate that my mind took me from Mark to that disgusting man. The excitement quickly turns to revulsion. I know the bastard is dead, and although I don't want to rejoice in anyone's death, I can't deny that he deserved it.
I decide to take a shower in the bathroom on the first floor, then go to the kitchen and make a sandwich with whatever I find in the fridge.
When I finish eating, I tap my fingers on the counter, trying to think of what to do for the rest of the afternoon, having enough energy to remain human for a little while longer.
I look out the window, feeling the urge to go outside...
I shouldn't go out again. I know that. But there's something inside me that pushes me forward, something that still wants to feel more, explore more.
