Page 23 of Christmas at the Scottish Lodge
JED
20 December
Jed. Effie says you got yourself snowed in with that lass. Remember you have to stay focused. The clock is ticking. Boyd
Jed stared into the abyss that was Devil’s Run and felt his insides curl into themselves. It was morning, only just light, and a fine mist hovered above the ground which added to the spookiness and general sense of foreboding. He tightened his grip on the ski poles and heard something rustle but didn’t look back. He had to concentrate – there was a lot riding on the ski championships. If he won, he might be able to restart his career, even pick up his agent, coach and sponsorship deals again. His future hung in the balance – a decent run and he could pay off his dad’s debt, then he could beg Mairi to give him another chance. Tell her how he really felt.
His insides pinched. If he didn’t do it soon, the eejit from Edinburgh was going to steal her from him. He thought aboutthe bouquet she’d received yesterday and that stupid note, and made himself move forward. If he could just…
‘Go Turbo, go!’
Jed flinched as the voice rang out and he shut his eyes momentarily, searching for patience. He heard the sound of skis sliding and the stamp of poles and felt a presence beside him.
‘Scott.’ Jed knew his tone wasn’t particularly warm. But the kid had been stalking him since he and his da had come to stay in the lodge.
He angled his head and gazed at the boy. Scott was barely seventeen, with lean, rangy limbs and a voracious need for validation that had Jed’s stomach pitching. Why the hell would anyone want approval from him? ‘You shouldn’t be out here alone,’ Jed said, his voice gravelly.
‘You’re alone!’ Scott jutted his chin, the slight dusting of blonde stubble peppered across it caught the light, making Jed feel ancient.
‘I’m not skiing,’ Jed muttered, turning back to face the slope, ignoring the hard knot that twisted in his gut when he had a sudden flashback of the accident. ‘I’m thinking.’
The kid let out a low chuckle. ‘Then I’m thinking too. You’ve been down there this morning?’ He nodded at the angular slope and there was awe in his voice. Awe Jed didn’t deserve. ‘I used to watch you on TV and YouTube. You’re incredible. So fast.’ He shook his head, his eyes shining.
Jed cleared his throat. He wasn’t used to adoration anymore. When he got it, he usually fled. ‘I’ve not been down today,’ he answered stiffly.
Not for a long time. But he wasn’t going to share that. Few people knew about his…affliction. No one but his ex-manager, agent, his aunt Effie and Boyd. He winced. Quinn too, and Mairi probably suspected something, but the idea that she knew hewas afraid – that she’d see him as weak – had his stomach knotting into something a boy scout would get a badge for.
‘How about I go first and you give me some tips?’ Scott asked, his tone lazy, clearly trying to hide how desperate he was. ‘You once said, “If you want to win, learn from the best.” You’re the best.’ The reverence in his voice made Jed feel sick. He wasn’t anymore. He was a joke.
‘How about you get some breakfast?’ Jed muttered. He wanted to be alone. How was he supposed to overcome anything when he had the buzz of voices in his head, all these distractions?
‘We could get breakfast together. You could talk about your career, mentor me. I want to be just like you.’ The teenager wasn’t going to give up.
‘How about we ski to the lodge together?’ Jed slid backwards and began to turn.
‘Great, wow—’ Scott started.
‘I’ve got stuff to do there.’ Jed shut him down, shoving away the guilt when the boy’s beam dimmed.
He wasn’t here to mentor anybody. Hell, he could barely manage his own life. Once he got himself on track. Once he was riding the slopes without a care in the world and his Da’s debt was paid off. Then he might think about nurturing someone else’s talent. Until then he wasn’t worthy.
Jed managed to shake Scott off halfway back to the lodge. The boy had spotted his da and after a swift – albeit reluctant – goodbye and a promise that he’d make sure to track Jed down again, he’d skied away with a fluid grace and speed that had Jed’s eyes narrowing. The boy had talent – with the right coaching he might…
He shoved away the thought as his mobile rang and he picked up. He could see the steep curve that would lead him up to the side entrance of Holly Berry Lodge, so he unhooked his skis and decided to carry them so he could talk.
‘Quinn,’ he said the instant he answered.
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ his friend immediately shot back, sounding furious.
Jed’s eyes widened as his mind scoured through all the things he hadn’t shared with Quinn recently – and he stopped, feeling his blood slow, and his heart stop pumping. Had his friend somehow found out about him and Mairi being married?
‘What?’ His voice was a low-pitched rasp.
‘That Mairi is at Holly Berry Lodge, and she’s been there for days,’ Quinn accused. ‘I was going to contact you last night, but I got a call out and I’ve been halfway up a mountain for the last twelve hours. Count yourself lucky I’m too tired to drive to Aberlinnie, which means I can’t bloody your nose. What I don’t understand is why you didn’t tell me?’
‘Okay yes she’s here.’ Jed swiped a hand across his mouth, trying to think. ‘She’s not been here long. She came to visit and stayed to help Aunt Effie because Rhona has a dose of the flu. I had no idea she was coming,’ he admitted. He was walking a tightrope between truth and lies and knew it was precarious.
He didn’t know what else Mairi had shared with his best friend. Guilt ate like acid through his insides, he hated lying. But what else could he do? ‘I should have called when I knew, I’m sorry I got caught up.’ God he was an eejit – a selfish, useless one at that.
