Page 7 of Christmas at the Scottish Lodge
‘And you sound surprised.’ He looked wounded. ‘Last time I checked, I was still your husband.’
‘But—’ Mairi stopped, confused. ‘Quinn told me you’ve been dating someone else.’
Her brother had told her that Jed was seeing a chef who worked in a hotel close to the lodge. The news had devastated her, but it had also proved that any hope she’d harboured that he still had feelings for her were misplaced.
When he hadn’t returned to the lodge last night – or at least not while she’d been waiting up – she’d assumed he’d stayed over. And the idea of that had ripped her in two.
‘You haven’t contacted me since your accident. You didn’t want to see me when you were in the hospital.’ Mairi heard the crack in her voice and took in a deep breath. ‘I thought you’d want this, that we’d be on the same page. I’m setting you free.’ She gazed at Jed, trying to read his face. Trying to understand what he was thinking. But he’d always been impenetrable. Even after they’d married, when she’d thought he’d finally let her into his head, he’d kept his distance.
Jed stared at her for a few moments, his blue stare heating to an ultramarine hue. Then his lips twisted. ‘Actually, we’re not on the same page. In fact, we’re in entirely different books,’ he choked, clearly upset. ‘My answer is no. I won’t be signing anything today, tomorrow or anytime soon. Because I want to stay married to you.’ His eyes flashed fire and he carefully put the still full mug on the serving area, his knuckles white.
‘But…why?’ Mairi gasped, shocked as he stared at her for another long moment, his eyes still spitting heat.
She thought he was going to say something else, but then someone started singing ‘(You’re the) Devil in Disguise’ from somewhere deep in the lodge and Jed shook his head. ‘That’s one of our guests. I have to get to work.’ He swiftly turned andheaded towards the closest exit in the corner of the kitchen. Then he disappeared through it, slamming the door.
Running from her again.
Mairi stood for a moment, eyeing the Jed-sized empty space. Her jaw hung wide, her head spinning as her heart danced in her chest.
‘What just happened?’
Why did the man who’d broken her heart – her husband – who blamed her for ending his career, and had ignored her for the last eleven months, want to stay married? And why was her stupid battered heart telling her she wanted the same thing?
4
MAIRI
Mairi stood in her bedroom in Holly Berry Lodge and stared out of the wide window, admiring the beautiful mountains topped with shimmering snow and dense forests of trees. Her eyes drifted across the snow-capped peaks. Was Jed out on a slope somewhere about to hurl himself off? Skiing had always been his go-to way of dealing with problems and it seemed nothing had changed.
She still couldn’t believe what had happened in the kitchen earlier. Why hadn’t her unknowable husband immediately jumped at the idea of getting a divorce? Perhaps he needed time to think, or maybe he was having second thoughts? The idea that he might want to stay married to her had her alternately jumping for joy and wanting to give herself a stern talking to.
She’d spent months hoping he’d call to tell her that he wanted to see her again – but the phone had remained deafeningly silent, proving his father’s insistence that Jed thought she’d ruined his career was true.
Why would he suddenly change his mind now – was it just a case of wanting something he couldn’t have? She wished shecould see inside his mind. But Mairi knew she shouldn’t read his confusion as a sign that she should alter course.
She loved Jed body and soul, had since the age of sixteen. But it was obvious he didn’t feel the same. She’d been hurt badly by Mike, and it had taken years to get over that. She hadn’t had a tenth of the feelings for her ex that she had for Jed – and if she let this drag on, it would ultimately destroy any heart she had left. So she had to stay strong.
Her mobile suddenly buzzed in her pocket and she drew it out.
MF I can’t believe how much I miss you. I need to tell you that you’re the most amazing woman I’ve ever met. I can’t wait to see what the future holds for us. Come back to me as soon as you can. Harry xxx
Mairi flushed as she put the mobile back into her pocket. She’d been attending events with Harry J Miles for over two months as a colleague of sorts and he wanted to take the relationship to the next level. Which was why she was here.
Harry was a good man. He could be a little over the top sometimes and his feelings for her had escalated surprisingly fast. But he was the first man she’d met who wasn’t afraid to tell her how important she was. She’d be crazy not to grab it with both hands.
She shook her head as she unzipped her suitcase so she could finish unpacking. She’d been so weary last night, so distraught when Jed hadn’t returned to the lodge, that she’d simply got out a nightdress, a change of clothes for today, her phone charger and some toiletries.
Mairi winced as she lifted the lid and saw the brown envelope sitting on top of her clothes. It contained the divorce papers, and she pulled them out and quickly stuffed them into a drawer inthe desk that faced the window. She’d give them to Jed once he agreed to the divorce.
She turned back and gathered up two nightdresses and some underwear before placing them in the small white wardrobe to the right of the room. Then added two pairs of trousers and a few colourful tops, before tugging out her cardigan and favourite oversized pink jumper. Her heart stuttered when the edge of a golden high-heeled shoe was revealed. It was tucked between her slippers and some balled-up fluffy socks. She’d almost forgotten she’d brought it here.
Mairi swallowed and drew out the shoe, gripping it reverently, feeling a powerful swell of emotion. There had been no time to buy rings when she’d married Jed in Vegas. She’d hired her wedding dress – so this was the only physical reminder of the day she had. She only had one shoe. The other had been lost – much like the groom. An omen perhaps?
When she’d returned to the hotel room after her run-in with Jed’s da at the hospital and subsequent visit when she’d been turned away, she’d booked a flight to Edinburgh. She’d had to get away – to process what had happened and to give Jed space. Space she’d hoped he wouldn’t need. In a hurry to catch the flight, she’d frantically thrown her possessions into her suitcase, and had somehow missed one of the shoes.
She hugged the golden heel to her chest, before placing it on the desk – like a talisman reminding her of this morning’s conversation. Perhaps once she persuaded Jed to agree to the divorce, she’d finally be able to part with it, or at least stop carrying it around.
Mairi stroked a fingertip over the foam sole, before grabbing her laptop and placing it on the desk too. She had to take advantage of these few free moments to focus on her book. She was woefully behind on her deadline. She glanced at the shoeagain before opening the document and staring at the blank page.
