Page 58 of Christmas at the Scottish Lodge
‘You need to leave me to handle this,’ the paramedic said sharply. ‘This is no place for fans.’
‘I’m his wife,’ Mairi said, opening the door wider and climbing inside.
‘Is that true?’ the paramedic asked Jed, her forehead creasing. She was skinny with dark hair that had been tied back in a ponytail. Mairi couldn’t see much of her face because she wore a mask, but she’d have guessed the woman was middle-aged.
‘Yes,’ Jed said gruffly.
‘Is he alright?’ Mairi asked, stepping closer and hungrily scouring Jed’s limbs for injuries. His boots and beanie hat were lying with his helmet on a bench in the corner. He stared at her, his face emotionless.
‘I’m okay. Nothing’s broken. You should go.’ His voice was dull.
‘I’m not leaving you.’ Mairi folded her arms around her waist. She could see withdrawal in his eyes, the tell-tale sign that he was cutting her off.
Was he trying to protect her, or did he think the accident was her fault? She had put pressure on him. Her stomach ached like someone had added acid to it and stirred. ‘When can he leave?’ she asked the paramedic. She had a sudden urge to bundle Jedinto her arms and kiss away the hurt. But a kiss wasn’t going to fix what was broken here.
‘I want to keep him under observation for a while longer,’ the woman told her. ‘He doesn’t seem to be concussed and nothing’s broken, but…’
‘I just got knocked out for a second,’ Jed said, jerking his chin so he could meet Mairi’s eyes. ‘We should probably talk later…’
‘I want to talk now,’ Mairi insisted because she wasn’t going to be fobbed off. She’d been there, done that and spent months waiting, but he hadn’t turned up.
‘Let me.’ The paramedic tipped her head towards the back of the ambulance. It was a tiny space and she’d be able to hear every word, but she went to shuffle through a drawer of supplies, making plenty of noise. ‘I’m not listening,’ she told them. ‘But if you start to feel unwell, then I need to know.’
‘Aye, I’ll be sure to mention it,’ Jed said dully, his eyes fixed on Mairi’s face.
She blew out a breath and took a step closer to the bed, saw Jed ease away. It was the tiniest movement, but Mairi felt something inside her break.
‘So that’s it?’ She swallowed.
Jed scrubbed a hand over his eyes. ‘I told you if I can’t ski…’ He let out a long breath.
‘You’re nothing?’ she asked, her voice low. ‘Because you didn’t win and no one’s clamouring around, telling you how incredible you are that means our marriage is over?’
He sighed. ‘Or on hold.’ He grimaced. ‘If you’ll wait.’
She shook her head. ‘You’re a winner just for getting back out on the slopes. For facing what scared you. I don’t understand why that’s not enough.’
‘There are things you don’t know. Things I don’t want you to be part of.’ He looked pained.
‘Is this because you blame me?’ she asked, hearing raw hurt in her voice.
‘No,’ he said simply. ‘I told you before, none of this is your fault. I just…’ He sighed. ‘Mairi, I love you, but sometimes that’s not enough.’ He shrugged and she could see the movement hurt him. There was a bruise on the side of his face and he looked exhausted and her heart filled with sympathy, but she pushed the feelings away.
‘So you want me to wait or walk away, is that it?’ she croaked. ‘Because if you want me to leave, you need to say that to my face.’
She heard a rattle at the back of the ambulance as the paramedic dropped something.
Jed let out a breath and met her eyes. ‘I think you should go.’ He delivered the blow in a low voice, but it had enough power to stop the breath in her throat.
‘Perhaps you’re right,’ Mairi choked, stepping away, her legs wobbly. ‘But you need to know, this time I’m not coming back.’
‘I just need more time.’ Jed swallowed and his body shuddered. ‘I told you, there’s another event in February. If I can win that…’
‘I’m not waiting, Jed,’ Mairi sighed. ‘I told you when I got to Holly Berry Lodge that I wanted a divorce and you wouldn’t give it to me. I’m not going to settle for staying a secret until you finally get to the end of a run. Until you prove yourself to god knows who. I need to know I mean more to you than your career.’ Her eyes filled and she fought the tears. ‘I’m not prepared to play second best, not anymore.’
‘You’re not second best.’ He frowned and tried to sit up, pain flashing across his face. ‘I’m sorry, you don’t have the full story.’ He let out breath. ‘I didn’t want to tell you, but…’ He paused, contemplating. ‘My da owes money because he placed a bet on me and I didn’t win. I need to put it right. I can’t have you pulled into this situation. If people knew we were married, knew youwere an author they’d make assumptions that you could pay off his debt…’
She gazed at him, searching his face. Was he telling the truth? She couldn’t tell – but even if he was, it shouldn’t change anything. ‘You’re looking for more excuses,’ she said softly. ‘If your da owes money because of you, I will help.’ She had some savings; she’d give it all up if it would give Jed some peace.
