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To the last one, I quirk an eyebrow, and he just sighs. “I don’t know. Max has a thing for feet or something.”
I take a look through the list and catalogue all the things that have been written. Some are silly, some are important, and there’s one about a candle I don’t get, but overall, it’s coming together.
But…
“You know, sunshine. There’s something missing here that’s really important,” I say, softly closing the notebook and setting it on the table.
He cocks his head with a questioning look. “Huh? I mean, I’m sure there is, but what are you thinking?”
I don’t know why my lips are suddenly so dry or my heart starts racing. This is Skylar, for fuck’s sake. I don’t get nervous around him. Still, my hand is a bit shaky as I raise it to cup his cheek. “Can I show you?”
He innocently nods, his eyes wide with trust as I lean in and kiss him.
I can’t say what’s so different about this kiss from the rest we’ve shared. We’ve been kissing our entire lives. At first, forcomfort, then out of habit, and finally due to need. This is different, though.
Skylar thinks I’m some type of poet. That I’m good with my words, but I’m not. Sure, I take time to think through the things I say, but that doesn’t mean I’m good at actuallysayingwhat I want. Not like Skylar, who’s just so brave and speaks his mind.
So, through this kiss, I show him what I feel. As I dip my tongue slightly into his parted lips and breathe in his shaky exhale, I hope he can understand all the unspoken words I’m trying to convey.
He pulls back, a bit breathless, and his lips quirk into a shaky smile. “Chemistry?”
It’s not exactly what I want, but it’s close enough. I nod and take his hand. For what I have planned, I don’t want to be on the couch. Instead of taking us to his room, I bring him to mine. Maybe in the back of my mind, I knew I’d want to do this tonight, because I actually made the bed for once and picked up all the dirty clothes that are usually scattered on the floor.
The air shifts as our lips meet once again, and his soothing presence wraps around me. Usually frantic with energy, this kiss is long and drawn out. It’s a gentle flick of tongues, a soft exchange of breath, a sweet representation of what we really are to each other.
Soulmates.
When I lay him back on the bed, he wordlessly strips. I join him, and with every article of clothing that’s shed, it’s not just our bodies that grow closer. In my mind, we’re connecting like we never have before. And all of it is due to sheer intention.
Because while I love him when I fuck him like I hate him, I want to show him what it’s like to be treasured.
To bein love.
“Cassius,” he breathes out, head tipped back as I suck his little cock into my mouth. “That’s not what I want right now.”
Licking a stripe up his length, I kiss the tip. “I know, sunshine. Can you hold on for me?” I scrape my nails soothingly down his open legs. “Can you just let me…”
Make love to you.
Fuck, how cheesy does that sound? But it’s the truth. It’s what I want. It’s what I’ve wanted since the moment Skylar and I were old enough to understand what sex was. Something reverent and sacred. Something that you can only ever have with one person. Something special.
I’m too clouded in my absolute obsession with him to understand what the widening of his eyes means, or the shaky exhale he lets out. But when he nods with a cute little smile, I continue.
I think I torture him.
I spend countless minutes worshipping his body and finding all the spots that make his toes curl and his eyes flutter shut. I spend an hour opening him up for me and bringing him close to the surface, only to drag him back down into the state of meaningful lust. I explore. Simply explore all the places I’ve been too hasty to get to know.
The spot behind his ear that, when I lick, elicits the sexiest whimper.
The crevice of his elbow that, when I kiss, causes him to giggle.
The back of his knee that, when I give attention to, makes him moan.
All his smooth edges are exposed to me, and when I get to his arms, I take a silent moment of remembrance. A second to appreciate how far Skylar has come.
My words fail me again as I slide into him. I shudder, bending his arm over his head so I can drop a kiss to the inside of his wrist where the most violent scar rests. As I deliver deep, smooth thrusts, I settle my lips against every scar I can reach.
“C-Cass,” Skylar whispers, and when I look down at his beautiful face, I see a single tear tracking down his cheek. “No one’s ever…”
