Page 52 of Two for Holding
Tyson Fuller.Who hadn’t written to him once since he left Philly.
Jax groaned and tossed the phone somewhere into the bedsheets.People would ask about the trade now, and he’d have to play it cool and pretend nothing had happened or lie about it.He would have to do his level best not to burst out with the truth because as much as he might hate lying, he had no idea what the league would do with him if he told the truth.
He had no idea what San Francisco might do with him.
Jax didn’t dare hope they would go to bat for him.Especially not when Tom—well, Tom would have to do everything he could to distance himself from Jax publicly if Jax were to come out.No more kissing practice.
Not that they’d be practicing again.Tom didn’t need it.He’d been so pliant and…lovely in Jax’s arms yesterday it made Jax’s heart hurt.Any man would be lucky to have him.
Jax buried his face into a pillow and screamed.
At twelve thirty, as Jax debated going for a run to get out of his own head despite the sleet rain pounding against the window, Tom knocked on the door.
Jax bounded over and opened it.“I thought you were with your family.”
“I was,” Tom said, grim and gaunt, as though he had aged ten years in one evening.“Can I come in?”
He’d never asked before, had only pushed his way in and tried to stop Jax from doing anything he deemed too dangerous.
“You can always come in,” Jax said before his mouth got any input from his brain.Oh well.It wasn’t wrong.
Tom smiled.“Careful, or I’ll get a second key and barge in all the time to talk about the power play.”
“I wouldn’t mind.”Jax needed to reel this in, change the subject, and move on, or else Tom would realize he’d been thinking about having Tom in his room, in his bed, in his heart.“Are you okay?”
Sitting on the edge of the bed, Tom looked up at Jax.“It’s been a lot, the last few days.”He smoothed down the edge of the sheet.“And, um…yesterday?When you were…when we were…”
Kissing!Jax wanted to shout.We kissed, and you ruined me for life!There’s now a section of my brain devoted entirely to replaying those kisses over and over again!
Tom squared his shoulders the same way he did when meeting an opponent in the face-off circle.“I haven’t felt so good in years.It was like I…like I wasn’t in charge, like I could just feel.I want to feel that way again.I know you said I don’t need practice, but I think I do.I don’t know if I could trust anyone else, you know?I feel safe with you.”
Jax sat next to him on the bed, primarily because his knees had lost the ability to keep him upright.He took Tom’s hand in his own.“You can practice with me as much as you need to.”
Tom’s fingers tightened around Jax’s.“Good.Can we, um…can we be lying down this time?”
Jax wouldn’t survive this.There’d be a scorch mark left on the bed where he’d burned to a crisp from wanting a man utterly unaware of the devastating effects he had on his surroundings.
They scooted up the bed until their heads rested on the pillows.
Jax made a face.“Why are there no good pillows in hotels?”
“I have a memory foam one at home.”Tom turned to his side to face Jax.“You should try it sometime.”
Was Tom inviting Jax into his bed?Was he aware of how those words sounded?No, this was Tom Crowler.He would probably have Jax come over and lie in his bed and test the pillow, which would definitely smell of the shower gel brand he’d done a sponsorship deal with a couple years ago.He had a dozen bottles of the stuff in his stall at the practice rink, but grimaced every time he used them.Then, he’d wander off to the kitchen to offer Jax a Gatorade or something instead of kneeling over Jax’s face and letting Jax eat him out.Tom was too oblivious to his appeal for his own good.
Jax turned so they were nose to nose.“Sounds good.”
With an impatient sound, Tom pulled him closer.“Aren’t you going to…”
“What?”Jax rubbed their noses together.
“Aren’t you going to kiss me?”
Feeling a little puckish, Jax asked, “Why don’t you kiss me?”
Tom rolled onto his back and dragged Jax on top of him.“I want you to do it.”
If Tom’d had any sort of contact with any aspect of queer culture, Jax would have teased him for being a pillow princess.As it was, the combination of his pouty, pleading look and the full spread of his body under Jax’s sufficed to make Jax give in.
