Page 84 of Two for Holding
“Jax?”Tom’s voice was hoarse from begging.“Jax?Are you all right?”
“Mm-hmm.”
“Did you—did you finish?”
“It’s fine.”Jax’s voice cracked.
“Jax.”As soon as Tom’s hands were free, he grabbed for Jax, pulling him close.“What’s wrong?”
“I…” Jax tried to turn away, to hide his face, but Tom wouldn’t let him.
“Please.”
“I don’t want this to be over,” Jax burst out.“Why can’t we keep—why can’t we—”
Tom’s face fell.
“Sorry.I know this was just…practice to you.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.”
The dismissal irked Jax enough to forget his reticence.Tom might not share his feelings, but he didn’t get to pretend they didn’t exist.He opened his mouth to snap back, but Tom got there first.
“Of course I want to keep doing it!”Tom said it as if it were a given, and Jax should have somehow known.
“You do?”
“Of course I do!If it were just practice, I wouldn’t keep asking you to stay the night.I wouldn’t want to spend all my time with you.You were always running out the door.”
“Because I knew I’d get my heart broken if I stayed!”
“Oh.”
They stared at each other for a long moment.
Finally, Tom asked, “Could you untie my legs?”
Jax’s hands still shook as he did, this time from the hope clawing its way up from the pit of his stomach, making him jittery.
With his legs free, Tom drew them up under himself.“I’m sorry.”
“Why?”
“For hurting you.”
“But if I—and you—can’t we?”
Tom looked away, tugging at the bedsheets to pull them up.“Are you still doing the shelter thing tomorrow?”
As fast as it had come, Jax’s hope cratered.“Yeah.”
“Well.Then.”
“But, Tom, no one would have to know about—”
“You want to come out.”
He said it with such finality, as if it were a certain death knell for any possible relationship.
