Page 137 of Ruthless Chaos
“It’s fine, Alize. Right now, I’m just doing this to ensure that everyone knows they will incur my wrath if they so much as look at you the wrong way.” He cracks his knuckles. “But I will have you move in if I see it as the only way to keep you safe.”
His words aren’t much of a consolation.
Suddenly, my world feels upside down. A moment ago my biggest worry was that Alexander didn’t want to define this outing—now, the prospect of memoving in with himis on the table.
I run my fingertips on the pendant hanging from my neck, tracing the Kingmaker Crest. It’s the same one on the ring he always wears.
“Was this the only way?” I ask, tugging on the necklace.
I wish I hadn’t been so eager to have him put it on. The spectrum of what it entails weighs on me. Yes, I do want to be safe, but this feels so…serious. Like we’ve skated right past dating and into something akin to marriage.
Alexander is quiet. My eyes snap to his face to find that his expression has darkened.
“I chose you as my Courtesan a few hours after I met you. Just so the other Kingmakers wouldn’t give you a hard time.” His voice is gruff. “I never intended to give you this necklace because it makes our situationpermanent. There’s no turning back after this.” He runs a hand through his hair. “Cassidy and Keller have given me no choice. It’s the only way I can stop them from hurting you without killing them.”
Oh. Again, disappointment squeezes my heart.
So, this has nothing to do with how he feels about me. It isn’t even serious to him. They’ve forced his hand, so now he’s stuck with me.
Apparently, the idea of permanence with me is revolting to him.
“You must be enduring such great agony,” I snap. “Getting yoked to someone like this, against your will.”
There’s so much irony there, as if he hasn’t hunted me these past few weeks. As if our path to wherever we are hasn’t beenforceful.
There’s fire in his eyes when he meets my gaze.
“Of course I am, Alize,” he hisses. “More than anything else, I hate not having a choice.”
Ha. Choices.
“What is it about this that’s so revolting, then?” I say. “Is it because I didn’t let you fuck me by the lake? Or is it because I’m not falling over you like all the other girls? Maybe you shouldn’t make me your Courtesan at all, and go find somebody you like.”
Is this why he didn’t want to call this a date?
My head spins—I’ve had Alexander wrong all this time.
Now that the words are out of my mouth, there’s fire in my belly.
Alexander’s eyes turn the color of the deepest part of the ocean. His jaw clenches and his eyebrows pull together. He’s as angry as I am.
Good.
“What the fuck are you even on about? This is about keeping you safe,” he hisses. “This is the first fucking time I’ve taken a Courtesan, Alize. If I just wanted someone to fuck, I wouldn’t go through all this trouble.” He inches closer to me, and his grip on the bench whitens his knuckles. “Or would you rather I leave you to die?”
There’s hatred in his eyes, but I meet them with my own cold stare.
“Fuck you, Alexander Duke.”
Alexander grabs my wrist so tightly I’m afraid I’ll bruise if I struggle. He yanks me toward him. I collide with his chest, and his other hand finds the back of my neck.
He roots his fingers in my hair, angling my face towards his. Pain shoots through my scalp, sending a shockwave to my core.
Alexander grins wickedly. “Do not mistake my kindness for weakness.” His voice has taken on a dangerous depth, and I hate that beneath my anger, a shiver snakes up my spine. “If you keep fucking arguing with me, I’ll fill you with my cock right here, in front of everyone.” His threat has heat pooling in my core. Why do I like this? I squeeze my eyes shut. “And you know what, Alize? You would enjoy every second of it. Deep down, I know that’s what you want. All this backtalk, all this anger. It’s because I haven’t fucked you yet.”
My lips are trembling by the time he’s finished speaking.
I don’t know what to do with my hands and I won’t open my eyes. If I look at his face, I’m afraid of how what I see will make me feel. The pain and the rush of his threats already has my heart slamming against my chest and heat pooling low in my tummy.
