Page 99 of His Forgotten Colton Fiancee
Chapter 20
Quinn walked around the kitchen in a daze. She picked up a bottle of seasoning, set it down. Picked it up again.
Everything inside hurt as if someone had sliced her open. Backing up against the wall, she slid downward until she sat on the floor. Quinn buried her face into her hands.
How could this have happened? She didn’t remember her life with West, but everythingindicated they’d been happy. He’d loved her, cared for her. Quinn had been alone for most of her adult life, never finding that right man she wanted to marry.
And now she’d pushed him out of her life and she was alone once more.
How could he lie to her? What was wrong with her that everyone left her?
There’s nothing wrong with you, a little voice inside whispered.You’re fine. It’sthe other people who have a problem.
Her father. Her mother, and the parade of stepfathers roaming in and out of her childhood. Even Demi, who had never wanted to get close.
And West.
But maybe it wasn’t always them. Not West, who had been kind and thoughtful and staunchly always there for her.
Maybe it’s you.
It hurt to acknowledge she was partly at fault.
If you hadn’tshut him out, shut him down, jumped all over him when he told you the truth, he’d still be here.
She hated secrets. Secrets damaged people, they seldom could be kept for long. Most of all, she hated being the target of one.
And yet West merely did his job. He hadn’t come to Red Ridge for her, but to find the Groom Killer, and discern if Demi’s relatives knew her hiding places.
Allher life, she’d felt like a second-class citizen, the Colton from the wrong side of the tracks. She’d struggled to build her business, build respectability.
No one would ever ignore her or make her feel rejected and unwanted again. The only people who drew close were those who wanted something from her.
That’s the real reason I drove West off. All those memories from the past, the peoplewho I thought cared and didn’t. I thought he was the same. He kept a secret from me. But other than hiding his real purpose here, what crime has he committed?
Did he ignore you as your mother did? Sneer at you and tell you to “get lost, kid,” as your second stepdad did?
Invite you to parties as that one Colton cousin did, and then laugh, saying, “Mistake. You aren’t invited, after all.”
No, he’s been nothing like that. Don’t screw up, Quinn. Don’t toss him into the garbage pail of all your past hurt memories and paint him with that brush because you’re afraid of getting hurt again.
Afraid of being rejected like you were all those times from your stepdads, and your own mother.
Quinn lifted her head and hugged her knees. There was a killer on the loose and Agent WestBrand vowed to keep her safe. He kept that promise.
She’d made a promise, too, to marry him. To trust that the old Quinn would love him enough to commit the rest of her life with him. Because for her, marriage wasn’t like shopping at a grocery store as it had been with her mom.
It was the real deal, a one-stop, no-more-shop event. The old Quinn would have worked hard at marriage the sameway she’d done with her catering business. It didn’t matter what others in town thought of her.
What mattered the most was how she thought of herself.
The oven timer dinged. Quinn walked over to the industrial oven to check on the cream cheese enchiladas. Steam misted from the bubbling dish. Using heavy mitts, she pulled it out and set it on a metal trivet.
It smelled delicious, butshe had no appetite.
She found a box to pack the foil containers and keep them warm. Everything was ready. Except Austin wasn’t here. Her business partner had muttered something about getting sales from a client preparing an end-of-summer party in another city.
Ordinarily she wouldn’t mind, because she loved to cook and focus on her creations. Today the quiet bothered her. Too much swimmingthrough her brain. Not memories she desperately needed to recall, but images of West.
