Page 33 of An Offer for a Spinster
“I suppose that’s a point,” Elizabeth admitted begrudgingly. “But ifyoulikehim, that might be a sign to put off Lord Barwood.”
“I’m promenading with Lord Barwood this afternoon,” Katherine said dully. “William and Mama forced me into it. I need to leave soon, to get ready. He’s got a new gig he wants to show off. And I suspect he wants to show me off, too.”
A prickle ran up and down Elizabeth’s spine. “I don’t like that man, Kat. Really, I don’t.”
Her friend met her gaze, and for a moment, Elizabeth thought that it was all going to come out – everything she felt, allof her worries, her feelings for Timothy, her lack of feelings for Lord Barwood.
Then Katherine’s expression grew shuttered, and she looked away.
“It’s not as if I’m engaged to him,” she responded shortly. “I can’t afford to reject every man that comes my way. Time is running out for me, Elizabeth.”
That was that, then. Elizabeth had known her friend long enough to tell when a subject had been pushed far enough, and Katherine had just hit her limit. It would be wise to let the subject drop.
Perhaps Elizabeth was tired of beingwise.
“You hate promenading,” she said. “I know you do. You said it’s silly, a pointless exercise designed to make statements of one sort or the other. It’s just a hundred or so rich people wandering around a park, pretending to enjoy themselves and saying hello to each other. That’s what you said. Your exact words.”
Katherine pressed her lips together. “Perhaps so, but I also told Lord Barwood I’d go with him, and I don’t intend to go back on my word.”
“I thought you said William had made the promise on your behalf.”
Katherine abruptly got to her feet. “Listen to me now, Elizabeth. I know you, and I love you. I know fine well you are trying to do what’s best for me. I appreciate that. But the fact of the matter is that I am in a position which you can’t possibly understand. There is so much pressure on my shoulders that sometimes…” she trailed off, swallowing hard. “Sometimes I feel like I can’t breathe. Henry is more aloof and angrier than ever before, Alexander is sinking into a drunken depression, and William is going mad with fear and anxiety over what will happen to our family. My getting married won’t solve these problems, but they will open up the way for us to get the moneywe desperately need. I really must be allowed to make my own decisions in this matter. I appreciate your advice, but the choices here are mine. Not yours, not William’s, not Mama’s. Mine.”
The last word was spoken loudly and reverberated around the parlour.
Biting her lip harder this time, Elizabeth replaced her teacup and got to her feet.
“Of course,” she said softly. “I’m sorry, Katherine.”
Katherine relaxed a little. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m not… not angry at you. It’s just a difficult situation.”
Elizabeth nodded, pulling her friend forward into a tight hug. “I’m here for you. At least, I’ll try to be.”
“Thank you, Lizzie,” Katherine responded, voice muffled in Elizabeth’s shoulder. When they pulled apart a few moments later, Elizabeth could have sworn that her shoulder was wet with tears.
***
“Why not your red gown, Katherine?” the Duchess said for the hundredth time. “It’s very becoming.”
“Yes, Mama, but it’s also very thin. I don’t want to be cold.”
The Duchess tutted. “Cold! Fancy worrying about that. Red suits you, and I’m sure Lord Barwood will admire it.”
Katherine bit her lip hard, eyeing her reflection. She’d chosen a grey riding suit, which would not have been an ideal choice, but it was warm and would allow her to climb up into Lord Barwood’s high gig.
He would be here at any minute.
With a dismissive gesture, the Duchess dismissed the maids, who bobbed curtsies and scuttled out.
Wonderful,Katherine thought tiredly.A lecture.
“My worry, Katherine,” the Duchess said slowly, “is that you are not doing enough to secure the earl.”
“Not doing enough? Mama, I can’t throw myself at him.”
The Duchess met Katherine’s eyes squarely through the mirror. “You know that Lord Barwood has an interest in you. He’s been very clear. This is courtship, my girl.”
“I’m aware.”
